5 Core values of a good communicator

byFusion707

70 followers

Updated 9 years ago

Often times social interaction gives us a weird feeling of trying to be nice with people or just plain simple unable to lead conversations on a smooth no pressure situation. It is one of the most untold things and obviously a non-academic skill not even most of our instructors teach us on a regular basis as part of school curriculum. So, as someone coming from this same situation unlearning things and learning new ones to improve our communication skills really makes a big difference when it comes to social networking. I'm not a guru of any social networking team or an expert professional but going through the psychology of our human behaviors and learning from the best people with the right experiences taught me a lot on making awesome social interactions with people so this is my take on the subject. There are thousands of great resources out there about about having great communication skills and while this is a supplementary source I hope we get a lot of relevant information on this post as well. Straight to the point, let's get going. Here are a few ways for us to check our progress along the lines of being an awesome game changer.

First off, great conversationalists know how to listen.

This crucial step is one of the most neglected part of any social interaction and is very important to humanize every single exchange of words and ideas between two or more people. Listening is different from just hearing words from the other person's mouth or on what he/she says but the ability to listen to what the person conveys and even just his or her name can greatly impact our communication with others. Listening intently conveys to the other person that they are important to you and that their thoughts matter. It makes the conversation personal and in addition makes the conversation more lively and enjoyable.

Second one is eye contact.

While this sounds so obvious and repeated more and more from the best communicators the reason is pretty simple, because it is a vital part in every social interaction. Imagine a random conversation between two people standing on a park and while the other one asks about directions the other one answers back with words, no eye contact and points to the direction where the other guy wants to go. Well it doesn't sound that weird since they just met each other but try it out with your date on a dinner or just some casual coffee time. I can't stress it enough but eye contact is one crucial key to communicating our words and ideas to people. It is our mirror to what they feel in every interaction.

Third one is body language.

The line that says action speaks louder than words is truly an awesome game changer. When speaking with people personally or on stage speaking with a crowd of a hundred, your action speaks louder than what your words convey. The right hand gestures and body language ticks communicates to people the most accurate information you are wanting them to understand as you speak. Will explore the body language basics on the later posts.

Fourth is gotta be your vocal tone.

If action speaks louder than words, your vocal tone speaks about your confidence as a speaker and as a person. Let us remember, one of the greatest fears of people is speaking in front of others because of the lack of confidence and or the lack of the ability to convey their thoughts to people and one of the most important things to remember is vocal tonality. As I'm writing this I am thinking of radio DJ's who make conversations online and on air for a living. Listen to them speak and notice their tone of voice. It doesn't stay the same on a monotonous tone that sounds sleepy and timid but it sounds alive and personal. It goes the same as well as speaking in front of people and one cannot ignore the presence of the things mentioned above and only work on developing their vocal tone. Every piece falls into place and is developed over time with the right mindset to be able to be an effective communicator.

Fifth one is your ability to ask questions.

Note, there is no rule to what kind of questions to ask during conversations but there certainly is an effective cut to the chase expression that does make every conversation flow smoothly. Open ended questions always work well during one on one interactions and let us remember the people love to talk about themselves. Open ended questions fulfill our brains pleasure centers and gives us a feeling of being important to the person we are telling our stories to. So, great communicators ask questions and more importantly tries to validate if their audience really gets what they are saying. One example would be saying, "Did you get what I mean by that?" These questions are far more friendly because you are trying to know not only if your audience really understood your point but on how well you convey your thoughts to them as a speaker.

While effective communication is very important in our daily lives, we are not limited as to how we can convey our thoughts may it be online, personally or in casual interactions and or speaking engagements. or whatever things we can accomplish in one of these, confidence is always the key to unlock these awesome game changing abilities. Fortunately, great communication skills come with practice and life changing habits that automatically turns into a natural state of communication that's effective and personal. Remember these game changing habits and make sure to live by it and you'll be on your way to success and proudly communicating with all confidence. If I have to suggest a book to read that's a great supplement for this do get a hold of Dale Carnegie's book, "How to win friends and influence people". For more than sixty years of rock solid truths and principles that made it a timeless bestseller, I strongly recommend this book a read. Until the next pages, Be awesome, be a game changer!