Are you on the right path?

bydjweiss

478 followers

8 years ago

My guest blogger, Lorraine Banfield, recently wrote a piece about failure and being on the right path… I thought it might be of interest to the WA Community:

One of the things about failure is that we don't usually fail where we are celebrated. When we are on the right path for us we are almost always celebrated and valued. When we fail, it is a sign to re-think our path. I used to tell people that “failure was their opportunity to start again more intelligently”, a quote from Henry Ford. It has occurred to me recently that this may not be the best advice because it implies that all you need to do is do a better job, a more intelligent job of whatever it is that you have failed at - it's an ego idea and not a soul one. This seems logical for someone like Ford, an engineer and industrialist who chose his path and stuck to it his whole life. His path, although it had its ups and downs and wrong turns and in many people's view of him he may have strayed off his path but he died a millionaire many times over and so he is often cited as a big success. However, is money and fame the only motivators to a life well lived? I don't think so. I prefer the philosophy of Joseph Campbell who said "Follow your bliss."

What I now see, and this philosophy has been building over time for me and my work, is that when we are on the right path for us, things mostly work out and we do not have much failure in our lives. But that when we do, when we feel either miserable or just slogging away, we need to look at it and say, wait a minute, “Am I going in the right direction for me?”. Is this failure or misery a message to make a course correction rather than to double my efforts and put my nose to the grindstone? Now, I am not saying that life does not have its detours and road blocks - it does, but each of these is a lesson to be learned and that lesson may not be to work harder or smarter, but a message to make sure you are on the right path.

James Hillman wrote a book called The Soul's Code in which he says we are all called to a particular path and that when we are on this path and attending to the tasks and challenges it presents to us, we will feel we are going in the right direction and that the failures and accidents that happen to us along the way are messages from our soul to take some time to look at this and see what it means for us personally. He says, "The idea is to look at the accident or injury or disturbance, as a potential with some sort of meaning to it." For me, just working harder at something is not the message, the message is usually deeper and more profound than that.

So the next time you fail at something or feel you are not being successful at something or you simply hate getting up in the morning to go do whatever it is, take some time and reflect on the path you are on. Is it the right one for you? Does it feel right on a soul level? Does it bring you a sense of purpose? Does it provide you with what you need in this life to feel your life has meaning and you are doing what you are here to do?

If what your path is providing is a means to an end but your daily life is not much fun and you don't find much meaning or purpose in it except making a living, then I suggest taking some time and reflecting on what your bliss might be. I welcome your comments and hope you are having a blissful time or at least a growing and learning one.

Blessings, Lorraine

Loraine’s work is about helping others live a soulful life of meaning and purpose. She does this through her private practice, Turning Points, where she does psychotherapy and psychological consulting in Denver and throughout the English speaking world. Her focus is on helping my clients use their strengths, talents and gifts in both creating the life they want and solving life's challenges. She uses the tools of her profession developed by others and those she has created herself. Her work with clients is private, confidential and can be one on one or via on-line programs and telephone sessions. She also writes books, present seminars, classes and do speaking engagement to various groups in Denver and throughout the world. Her credentials include a master's in Counseling Psychology from University of Colorado at Denver, a bachelor's in Human Development from California State University at East Bay and a course in Authentic Happiness Coaching from Martin Seligman, the father of positive psychology. She has also spent her adult life studying, doing research and writing about the meaning of life and how to become our best selves in the world.

Please visit her website: http://www.lorrainebanfied.com for additional information about her services.