I have a confession to make: but i will not quit: never!

I have been here almost ( 7 ) weeks. In those (7) weeks I have welcomed lots of new members. I also told them most of all to ask questions in chat when they needed help. Some times I even stressed this point. I have also commented on many new members setting and reaching their goals. I am sure that most if not all of the members thought they were talking to someone who has not only asked the same questions as they might have to ask other members, they most likely thought they were talking to a guy who has all his Ducks in a row. A guy who most likely has 2 or 3 websites up and running!

Well as a matter of fact I have no website up. Not a one! I haven't even found a niche yet!! That's right, no website, no niche! Now I told you how I was telling all these nice people to ask those questions when they needed help. Well ok, I have asked and received help from some members. I have PM 2 or 3 other members asking if I needed it,

would they help me out and each of them has said they would help out anytime and I am sure they would in a heart beat if I asked. Everyone has been so nice to me. I have never had anyone say anything but good things here at WA. I don't know what's wrong? Let me let all of you in on something about me. Let me ex plane:

First let me say this. I am not after a shoulder to cry on by no means. I suffer from Migraines Headaches. Bad Migraines. I don't know of any other kind! I have a really bad back. Its so bad that for over 20 years I was on !00mg. Morphine twice a day. That's a lot of pain meds. New doctors a few years ago asked me if I thought I could maybe cut down the amount of pain meds. I found out that the doctor many years ago should not have put me on the Morphine in the first place where I go to this clinic. This clinic is where I was put on this pain meds. Its the only place where I can go to see a doctor. So anyway, the doctors and I got my Morphine down to 45mgs. twice a day compared to 100mgs. a day. This is what I was taking. They told me I was most likely addicted to the pain meds. I did not like hearing that I was hooked. I didn't like taking it in the first place. I made up my mind I was going to get off the Morphine and do it by my self! Easy to say! I did not know what I had to go through to get off of it. I found out real quick! I found out in a hurry that I had to go off real slow. I will tell you over a good amount of time I went through hell at night hurting not only in my back, but my legs ached ln the bones. I could not sit still I would have to go out side and I would walk fast hoping to maybe where my legs out so I could go to sleep. I got my self down to 15mgs. twice a day. It seemed like it took for ever. I still had a long way to go yet to get off. Now I am doing this without my doctors knowing anything about it. They just talked about how I should have been put on some other pain pill. They were concerned that if I say had to have life saving medical treatment they would be limited to what they could do and they might not be able to save my life. Well I am in more pain than I was when taking the pain meds, some times it even gets bad with the pain.

I did it! I never quit trying to get rid of the pain meds. I did it. Did not quit!

Back to me letting people think I had my website up and was asking for help, well I did ask and got some help. I never let more than 3 or 4 people know was having trouble. I never lied to anyone, I just let them think I had my Ducks in a row! I did have help as I said, but I guess I am just too dumb, or there is something wrong with me. I am really not stupid I know it. I don't know what's wrong with me, but there is one thing I have to say!

I NEVER WILL QUIT!! NEVER EVER QUIT!! I DONT CARE HOW LONG IT TAKES ME!