Beating the odds - a miracle or the result of positive action?
What I am about to share is very personal to me but as it was 4 years ago yesterday a little miracle happened I feel I need to share.
December 2010 I was living in the Philippines with my fiance who was 5 weeks pregnant with our first and only child.
My fiance became very ill and got worse by the day - to the point she ended up in hospital with suspected denge fever. Her situation got worse by the hour and her fever was going through the roof. It wasn't looking good.
Now this particular hospital, like so many there, was so woefully underfunded that their stocks of medicines were all but non existent. At 8.30 on a sunday night I was given a list of medications needed and told to go and find them! I spent the next 2 hours running all over the city( a city I had very little knowledge of) tring to find pharmacies that were still open and had what we needed. I had to make it happen, I had no choice....I succeeded.
A number of blood tests were undertaken and it was soon revealed she didn't have denge fever but had in fact contracted German measles....not good news at all for our unborn child. We were informed there was up to a 95% chance our child would not survive or if it did it would not be perfect. We were devestated.
Was anything we did going to make any difference...we didn't know. Finding specialists was not an easy task where we were living and we didn't even know who or what to look for.
Finally we were given the name of an obstetrician in Cebu city. For us this meant a 3 hour ferry ride from where we lived and an overnight stay in the city before we could get a return ferry the next day. This we did every few weeks. Scans and ultrasounds were regular and everything seemed to be taking shape just fine physically...brain development was unknown.
Eventually we had to move to the city to live as the ferry would not carry pregnant woman past 7 months.
At 7 months an ultrasound showed abnormalities with top lip development...it appeared as though it was a cleft palate. Again devistated as we had been doing so well. We left our obstetricians surgery in silence.
It was quite possibly the toughest mental time of my life. I was battling in my mind. How could I stay opptimistic? What difference would my mental attitude make to the outcome? and so on. I did something I don't do....I cried. Not in front of my fiance - she didn't need that. She needed me to be strong. I cried for my fiance, I cried for our unborn child and all the challenges she would have to face in life....all the challenges I thought she would have to face.
After a couple of days of self pitty and confusion I made some decisions. No matter what may happen in the coming weeks and months we were going to have a daughter and I will love her with all my heart...no matter what! I will do everything in my power to ensure she gets whatever she needs medically and I will go to the ends of the earth to ensure she is happy. I realised things happen in life we have no controll over but what we do have is the ability to controll how we react to those situations and use them to gain experience and grow stronger.
I made plans. I met with the administrator of the hospital we had chosen for the birth of our child. We made a back up plan...just in case!
I sharpened up my attitude and started believing...trully believing it was all going to work out ok.
Another ultrasound. She's fine...no sign of any abnormalities.
The day finally came for the arrival of our child. At 1.09am a healthy baby girl arrived on this earth. She was perfect. My fiance was exhausted so they rolled her away to rest and took my little girl off to get cleaned up. I went downstairs and outside the hospital and just stared into space. I was in awe.
Seven and a half months. Thats how long I had been continually told by the proffessionals to prepare for the worst. Thats how long I had to try and believe we would beat the odds. Thats how long we had to hold that secret from family and friends because we didn't need another person trying to give us "pep" talks.
Yesterday we celebrated her 4th birthday. We celebrated the fact we have living with us a constant reminder that the odds can be beaten even when heavily stacked against you.
We need to stay strong in the face of adversity and not lose our faith...no matter what. We will always have challenges...its how we deal with these on a mental level that can make all the difference.
To your everlasting success
Steve
Recent Comments
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G'day Steve - thanks for the follow and for your excellent story. I admire your courage and sense of responsibility for the things that matter. I expect to see your triumphs in times ahead.
Thanks Larry. Its all about attitude ay mate....or I guess altitude and attitude where you're at. Cheers mate.
Thanks for sharing this and what a challenging time, I was welling up at the end of reading this. Your strength, faith and determination is so inspiring when the odds are like that! Hope you had a wonderful birthday for your little girl.
Thanks Alpine. Indeed we did have a good birthday for her. Her wish was for a rainbow party....wish granted.
I believe the easy path is not one we should venture down to readily at times. It is through adversity or failure we learn and better ourselves. Not to say everything should be a challenge but when it does occur thats when we dig deep and discover our reslience.
All the best.
Very personal and touching blog Steve. All about a part of your life and so decisive for the rest of your life. The positive side is that it develops qualities to overcome new setbacks and new challenges to succeed, online marketing included. Thanks for sharing, and also my congrats for writing your first blog within WA. Keep up the good work, Desmond.
Thank you for that Desmond. It's funny how much more of an impact that situation is having on me now after writing about it and then reading it as a third party. Many things seem to be coming into alignment currently....things don't just happen by chance. Joining the WA community has just given me such a spark and renewed zest for just about everything and I put that down to the likes of yourself and all the other members of WA who have taken the time to leave encouraging comments and help. So once again thank you for your time and feedback.
Steve
Incredible testament to the power of faith, I'm so happy for you, your wife and especially your precious daughter, wishing her a belated Happy Birthday! Great story with a great ending Steve:)
Thanks jazminf.
There was a great outcome from that story but that story is just the introduction to an even greater story which is the story of gratitude and belief.
Thank you for taking the time to read and reply. I wish you well.
It is a touching story, it must be very tough for you and yr wife, thanks so much for yr sharing, Steve. ;))
Thank you Jewel. It was more to highlight the fact we all have obstacles and barriers that test who we really are and in confronting these head on can determine our emotional outcome.
Thank you for reading :)
Steve a great t story of how circumstances do not matter. It is how you responded to what was going on and did not let the negative thinking rule your mind. You found the good side of it which is birth of a child which you will love no mater what happens.
Power of the mind!
Regards...
Indeed the power of the mind...it determines what the outcome means to you more than what the outcome is.
Thank you for your comment.
Steve thank you for sharing this with all of us. I know what you and your wife must have went through. I had a similar experience my self. It is very devastating let alone heart breaking. Your creator was working with you and the Holly spirit. It truly was God's intervention and miracle! You and your wife's strength really is to be admired. God bless both of you and your beautiful little girl. I wish you much success in all your endeavors...Linda:)
Hi Linda. We all have hurdles in life, its how we approach and deal with them that matters.
Thank you for your kind words.
How heartbreaking that you had so many months of despair and how heartwarming that your perfect daughter was born four years ago. You are so right when you say there are many painful situations which we face in life that we can do nothing about but we can control how we react. I am grateful that you have shared this very personal time in your life because it reminds all of us that how we respond makes a difference.
Thank you for that Quincy. Attitude can make or break you. Often its how we ract to a situation that is more important than the situation itself. Also reacting to something that has not yet happened can adversly affect the outcome before it has even happened.
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Steve, whether by instinct, practice or training you are a great writer. I was captivated both by this sharing of your self and your response regarding rankings in WA. I would suspect that this tremendous anxiety that you endured for months was the greatest period of growth you have experienced in your life time. These are the times during which we get to really know our self, our values, reassess our priorities in life.....and grow as a person. I love the times in life when all is great, going the way we wish and there are no immediate challenges.....but I don't seem to grow during those times to the same degree. Welcome to WA. You will be a huge asset to our group.
Harold
Thank you Harold. They are very kind words and I appreciate it very much.
It must be an instinct thing as I have no formal training and actually struggle putting pen to paper most times.
All the best to you Harold.