Relationships: What Are Your Thoughts On Marriage and Monogamy?

3
1K followers
Updated

I'm recently divorced and know I'll never marry again! I have a theory that monogamy is hard to do because of temptation. We become complacent throughout our marriage leading us to make bad decisions. Bad decisions wouldn't be made unless the marriage stayed interesting which is hard to do. Marriage is decreasing and may be unheard of within the next 10 years. What are your thoughts?

Login
Create Your Free Wealthy Affiliate Account Today!
icon
4-Steps to Success Class
icon
One Profit Ready Website
icon
Market Research & Analysis Tools
icon
Millionaire Mentorship
icon
Core “Business Start Up” Training

Recent Comments

15

I'm sorry to spoil it, but how exactly is this a success post? Don't use that tag for anything you write, thank you!

Oh, I 'm very new at this site. I pushed the success post? Oh my, I need to pay attention. Thanks for the critique.

No problem

According to the following article, 60 percent of men and 45 percent of women will have an affair at some point in a marriage, and affairs affect 1 in every 2.7 couples:

http://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/love-sex/are-we-meant-to-be-monogamous-why-people-cheat-open-relationships-and-life-after-an-affair-10097811.html

I've also heard of something called the "4 year itch", when a couple tends to get bored with each other after about 4 years of being together. In evolutionary terms it makes total sense. Offspring has successfully been produced, so now it's time to spread the genes elsewhere.

I'm rather cynical about relationships, so I would say that physical attraction is the start, then love develops to keep people together long enough for the first few years of a child's life. It's a biological trick to get us to reproduce. And it works. 7.4 billion people and rapidly rising. We're really just an advanced virus that has spread throughout this giant organism called Planet Earth.

All the relationships drama is the means to that end. But it provides storylines for TV showns and money for divorce lawyers.

But as I said, I'm cynical about the whole subject, so it might not be best to just take my view :-)

That post was solid brother....A++++.....

So, have you been doing well with your site monetarily? I'm about a week into it, but I haven't really heard of too many people making a significant amount of money? It's cool if you share and if you don't.

I really just need help finding the best way to drive traffic. Any tips?

innovativesolutions.siterubix.com is my site if you could take a look at it. I don't have a problem coming up with the info, but it's just getting traffic. Any advice would be great.

Thanks and thanks for the perspective too,

Nikolai

I started with the Affiliate Bootcamp, but it took me several months before I started getting referrals here. Then I started a website about making electronic music, but that didn't get many sales.

Then in June I decided to try making a mini niche site about budget tablets, and that hs recently started to make sales. I've got a case stufy training series here: I'm not sure whether that's a good WordPress theme you've chosen for your website. I don't like all the black at the top, and all the text is bold.

Right on..I didn't really like it either. Thanks buddy.

All,

Please don't be shy about answering this question. I'll go first. I think monogamy is downright insane in today's society. Well, I guess I should say that "in a man's perspective." Now, don't get me wrong, I was 100% faithful to my wife, and I would have never cheated on her because I took vows in the presence of God.

However, I can say that our relationship had gotten boring and routine. We never spiced things up or tried too. Well, I was always trying to spice things up, but she liked living a routine lifestyle and that killed me inside. So, once I had figured out that she didn't want to change her routine, I can honestly say I started noticing women more. Like I said before, I never cheated but I began having thoughts about what it would be like to be with another woman. I finally reached a point in our relationship where I knew she wasn't going to put forth effort on building our relationship to where it was interesting and fun. Yeah, we had two beautiful children, but it always focused on them which I'm not complaining about whatsoever because she is the best mother I've ever witnessed. I do think that we could have had fun as a family though. Do you agree or disagree?

The problem was that once the boys were born, she never made time for us. It was like daddy and hubby were out of the picture. It's funny, well not funny, but strikingly disrespectful in my mind to ignore her loving husband. I'm telling you, it was as if I wasn't even in the same room. She wouldn't even held a conversation with me because she was too busy doing something with her job or the kids. I played with the kids and fed them, and even when I was doing that it was nap time for her. Yeah, no communication whatsoever! Her routine had grown to taking care of the kids, work, and sleep.

So, to get back on topic, I do not believe nor will I ever believe in monogamy again. This traumatic event took a huge toll on how I see relationships now. I can now only have a best friend and see how that grows. I am probably talking out of my ass right now because of my situation and most likely I will find another loving wife in the future. But, I've analyzed this term with extensive, in-depth analysis and can't wrap my finger around how we can only be with one person our entire life. Again, I need to get my head out of my ass, but I just think it's so interesting, and it kind of fascinates me. I have so many theories about monogamy, but I just feel, as a nation, monogamy will not take precedence over an "open relationship." I believe in the next ten years an "open relationship" will be the norm. It will be a common aspect of relationships. I know many of my friends that have an open relationship, and I also know that women in general don't agree with that whatsoever.

Who knows though. I have my opinion, and you can agree or disagree with me. That's what makes this question so interesting to me. So, with that being said, please reply to this question because I want to hear other people's opinions.

Thanks and please respond,

Nikolai

Hey Nikolai,
I believe that you are at a point where you judgement is being
influenced by these "negative" thoughts. Please remember the old adage, "Time Heals All Wounds"! I have been there and
DONE that. Please DO NOT let your situation dictate your future
actions concerning personal relationships. I know that if you
harbor ill feelings toward an ex-spouse, it eats away at you
inside and hampers progress in many ways. Instead, try using
this as a "life lesson" learned by focusing on what happened and
the reasons why. If you identify the problem, the solutions can
be implemented. The two things that helped me the most were:
1. I did a lot of soul-searching to determine if I was doing all I
could - sort of self -analysis; 2. After determining that I WAS
part of the problem, I promised myself that WHEN I remarried,
that my behavior and actions WOULD reflect the lessons
learned. Now, I have been HAPPILY married to the same lovely
woman for almost 35 wonderful years. She is my wife, my life,
my motivation, my soulmate, and the very BEST thing that has
happened to ME! Believe me, there are MILLIONS of
outstanding women out there that can become a life-partner
for you and your beautiful family. ALWAYS remember that
behind every great MAN, stands a WOMAN. I leave you with
this final bit of advice: "Seek and ye SHALL find!" I hope this
helps.
Cheers,
Ken

Ken, thank you for the feedback. I know it's been eating away at me. I know time heals all wounds, but I just wish the time would go a little faster if you know what I mean. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't have two beautiful children though. I rarely get to see them, and it's driving me crazy. I'm on her schedule and only get to see them when it's convenient for her. I'm not going to get into it anymore, but on a positive note I'm truly excited about this new journey of affiliate marketing. I've found that writing is a great coping method for me, and I love writing about stuff.

I will take your advice and start searching, but one thing that's really bothered me is that I've not really wanted to find anyone else right now. I have no desire for a relationship at this point. I'm just trying to find good friends to hangout with and that's about it. Financially I'm struggling which is why I chose to give this a try, and I feel it will pay off in the near future. My writing skills are unique says my professors from college, so figured I'd use my skills and create a website full of solutions to marital problems. That's my main focus, but I think I'm going to expand my theme to just relationships. I know it's vague, but the mere fact is that we all have relationships with every thing we own. And, there are problems and issues that arise with those items. I'm talking in terms of a cell phone, car, clothes, etc. You see where I'm going with this. I think it may be too vague though. What do you think? If you want to check out my site it's:

innovativesolutions.siterubix.com

I'd like some feedback if you're willing, but if not don't worry about it. It's a work in progress still, and I'm only on my second week. I know I can come up with the information, but driving the traffic is my nemesis. If you have any ideas on how to drive traffic please share that with me. I can always help anyone that needs it on writing a specific page or post.just let me know, and I'll come up with something for you.

Talk to you later,

Nikolai

Hey Nikolai,
I just need to clarify one point about the search for the right
person (I didn't mean right away) because I understand where you are. Also, because I am a relative newbie, you would be better served in seeking out the Ambassadors as they possess
the talent that you are seeking. I hope this helps.
Cheers,
Ken

I am a die-hard, twice divorced, one long time lat-relation ended and for the third time married, so we are miles away from each other's thoughts:))

I don't mean to insult anyone by my thoughts so please don't take it that way. I apologize if I came off the wrong way too. I guess this is the only way I can cope with my thoughts. I'll try to refrain from some of my thoughts in my posts. Sorry again.

You haven't:) I always said, I NEVER marry again, after every divorce, but look at me, I am married for the 3rd time now, it's obviously just in your life, but never say never, and even then....:)

About monogamy? That's the only way a relationship works, if you are not planning to be, you'd better stay single.

I am a bit older than you are (56), and I have seen a lot of friends having a, so called, open relationship, it sucks, and they all are separated now. Your friends will come eventually to that point too.

Don't start a relationship, if you want an open one, you will only hurt each other in the long term. Stay single and go for one-night-stands.

I shall take your advice!! hahha

See more comments

Login
Create Your Free Wealthy Affiliate Account Today!
icon
4-Steps to Success Class
icon
One Profit Ready Website
icon
Market Research & Analysis Tools
icon
Millionaire Mentorship
icon
Core “Business Start Up” Training