Happy Relationships
For 54 years I've been in a relationship with the same woman. No, I'm not looking for congratulations.
My point is that both of us are happy in the relationship. However, it isn't because of the relationship that we are happy.
Both of us are happy people. I've learned through my years of experience working with couples that relationships do not bring happiness. Two unhappy people living together are not in a relationship; they are merely roommates.
Relationships Do Not Make You Happy
Although you may find yourself happy in your relationship, and I surely hope you do, don't depend on the new relationship to make you happy. I've known individuals who have lived in a relationship for years who were totally unhappy with the relationship.
A partner has to be happy before he/she can discover happiness in a relationship. In other words the relationship cannot make you happy. Either you are happy or you are not.
If you are looking for a relationship with another to make you happy, can I tell you it isn't going to happen.
I used to tell my audience of women at the prisons, "If he is a jerk when you are dating him, he'll still be a jerk after you marry him."
Happiness Comes from You
However one finds himself before establishing a relationship will be the same state he will find himself after the relationship begins. Happiness can only come from you.
A new car won't make you happy. A change in careers won't make you happy. Either you are happy or you aren't.
What Makes You Happy
Yes things can make you happy for a bit. However, whenever the new wears off, so, too, does happiness.
I believe the secret to happiness is your contentment with yourself. Learning to be content in all circumstances brings each individual happiness.
At one time there was an advertisement on television that ended with, "I'm Howard, and I'm happy in my own skin." No I was never in an advertisement. I only use my first name as an example.
However, I could have made the commercial because I truly am happy in my own skin. Blessings to all!
Recent Comments
15
A great message for all no matter how long they have been in a relationship.
I didn't realise what I was missing in life until I left an unhappy relationship.
Derek
Thanks for sharing, Derek. Some live in an unhappy relationship because they don't want to live alone. So they stay!
Thanks Howard!
A lovely post, and so true. If YOU aren’t happy with you, how can you expect anyone else to be happy with you!
Congratulations on finding another happy person to share your life with.
KyleAnn
The French have a saying about being comfortable in your own skin and its true!
We are happy in ours and also glad that our skins are with each other in this life journey we take together as a couple.
29 years for us this month.
Wishing you many more happy years together.
Colette and Philip
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You are blessed to have found that perfect someone. I just had to travel 5000 miles to find mine. lol. Better late than ever, right?
Mark, I don't have to tell you this, but when Mr. or Mrs. right comes along, 5000 miles is no hill for stepper! Blessings my WA friend.