One of our new WA members, Jaydeep, posted a very informative post today. I think everyone should take the time to read it. https://my.wealthyaffiliate.com/jaydeep/blog/3-things-that-limit-your-potential-and-how-to-overcome-them So, it brought up a question in my mind that caused me to want to ask for feedback. Do you suffer from Fear of Failure? If so, do you know what caused it in you? Most importantly, what do you do to overcome it? Would love to hear your comments. :)
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Stephanek Premium
The insidious pride of perfectionism causes most of my "analysis paralysis". I remind myself that there is only One who is perfect and ask for help to just walk through the fear. Resistance to change is worse than anything, so go for it.
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Kathy1952 Premium
Thanks for that encouragement, Steph! I do suffer from this and I do ask for help every day from Him who is the only perfect One! :)
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Shawn Martin Premium
No fear here that I can think of.
I have always embraced experiencing new and challenging things.
There was a time I could not speak in front of groups but I just did what it took to overcome that, I spoke in front of groups.
Still do not like it but can do it. Would that be a sort of fear?
Do you not love an answer to a question with another question? lol
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Kathy1952 Premium
Hi Shawn! It's official - You Have No Fear! :) Therefore, I guess I don't need to answer your question. :) However, I am now very jealous of you! But even so, I also now have two things to admire you for - your writing and your fearlessness! :) Hey, maybe you should change your user name to "Fearless One"or something like that. What do you think? :)
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tommo1968 Premium Plus
I know what you fear Shawn, server crashes, spam bots, viruses, hackers, etc. These all throw the shakes in me. :-) No only joking. I had thought about local marketing with WA but am fearful of first contacts, how to interact and give a good impression of my skills.
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Kathy1952 Premium
LOL! Hi Tommo! Nope, I still say Shawn is fearless! :) As far as your fear, I do understand. Anything we undertake here at WA causes us pause to wonder if we are doing it right. However, it always builds our confidence when we take that first step to do something new. I'm sure that your skills will be seen and your interaction will go well, especially with the tools we have here at WA to succeed. :)
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Shawn Martin Premium
LOL< I have many fears, just not of failure. Many people who fear success have issues they need to look at that seem unrelated, but really are the core to beating this fear. There can be a fine line between mistaking fear of failure with behavior of self sabotage. A person must make sure they are looking in the right places. I used to sabotage everything that would start to work in my life. I always thought it was fear of failure, when in reality I I had other issues to deal with. But I am much better now............. :)
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Kathy1952 Premium
Hi Shawn! You nailed it. I commit self sabotage all the time. I guess that at least I'm aware of it so can do something about it, right? I would sure like to get to the core of why I do this so I can be better like you. ;)
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Yes, I have had that fear & it still tries to creep upon me every now and then. I think it's because I think what if I succeed and then fall hard or can't keep up with the demand of my product. I know the spirit of fear is of satan, because GOD has not given us the spirit of fear, but of Power and a Sound Mind. Fear sets in so we will give up on our gifts and talents, but don't allow the enemy to torment you. You just have to reassure yourself that you are successful, brilliant, wise, and built with extreme Courage. If you have to say it to yourself in the mirror until you feel comfortable saying to yourself. Sometimes you have to enCourage yourself. Hope I helped. Remember think and speak positive to yourself about yourself. Words really do have power. So send out positive power toward yourself and others.
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Kathy1952 Premium
Hi Courageous! Love the user name. :) I am also a believer in God and believe it is His Spirit that empowers me. Prayer always helps to reinforce the true power we have in Him alone. My fear of failure doesn't really speak to me, but it's just there lurking. It's that subconscious voice. Probably there have been many accumulative experiences in my life to give it a voice. I do know that in the present, this doesn't matter. But how I battle through it now makes all the difference. Thanks for commenting and for the encouragement!
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ThomasPaul Premium Plus
Yeah, I definitely suffer from it on some level. Otherwise I would be taking massive action. It might be that I fear negative feedback more than failure itself. Again I'm not exactly sure where this comes from, but it affects other areas of my life such as dating as well. Or maybe it's that I associate a result that is not what I wanted as "negative". I might need to start thinking of those "negative" results as just results and adjust things until I get the result I want.

It seems like time helps for me, it comes to a point where I've realized I haven't done much of anything then I take some action. When I stop to think about how little work I've done in the past year and then think about what my business might be like today if I took consistent action then that usually motivates to take action. With this method that insight seems to come and go though.
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Kathy1952 Premium
Hi ThomasPaul! As I said to Kali below, thanks for your honesty in commenting on this post. What you said made me think of a book my daughter and I are reading right now about "boundries." It said that sometimes, if we've been exposed to a lot of negative things in our lives, we become conditioned to only letting the negative things in and keeping the positive things out. That gave me food for thought. I have read many great and positive posts here at WA that truly inspire me. And yet, they don't always inspire me to action which is very frustrating for me. I also have spurts of action, but I want to learn to always take action. I think what I've heard about setting goals is important. If I could just set one goal a day for myself and then follow through with that, it would probably help me to do more. I have come to learn that is where confidence grows. Thanks again for taking the time and energy to comment. :)
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kaliinozarks Premium
I read Jaydeep's link and recognized myself in a number of these issues. So, in answer to your question:

Do you suffer from fear of failure? I am not really afraid to fail. I have a lot of practice - so I do it well, I think I am most concerned about being recognized as a failure.

What causes the fear of failure? Usually not being prepared.

What do I do to try to overcome the fear? Usually, practice in private then when I feel more confident I will reveal it to the rest of the world.

For me, practice is the key.

This was a great exercise for me. Thanks for writing about it.
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Kathy1952 Premium
Hi Kali! Thanks so much for your honesty in your response. You are right, none of us wants to be viewed as a failure. I think sometimes if we feel failure in ourselves we perceive that others see it too and I'm not sure that's always true. Many of us are hardest on ourselves. I do watch myself actually sabotage myself sometimes. That is, I can see myself doing it and not stop it. It's weird. I don't want to dwell so much on what causes this in me as much as I want to learn how to fix it in me. That's why I asked for feedback from people here but commenting may make some feel too vulnerable and I understand that. Thanks for having the courage to comment. I appreciate it. :)
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kaliinozarks Premium
No problem, Kathy. I stand in front of students all day long. I'm used to messing up and hearing the snickers. I teach computers and my PC displays on a 12 Ft Screen, so every typo I make gets a reaction.

I've gotten used to it.

Kali
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Kathy1952 Premium
I suppose that's a good thing. :)
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