Oh-Oh! Mom Is Quiet Again...

byellyngeorge

63 followers

Updated 15 years ago

My two daughters, now adults and raising their own children, know one of two things to be true when I get "quiet":

1 - When they were younger it probably meant I was holding my breath before letting them know that I knew what they did and shouldn't have.  I won't embarrass either one of them because, okay, so now I laugh about their antics.  My "quiet" then was usually because I was trying not to laugh at the time knowing full well I had to be "such a mom" and make sure they didn't do the same thing again.

2 - Mom is either moving (like when I moved to Alaska and then New Mexico), taking on a new career (like when I learned to drive a big truck OTR at 50), for example.  My quiet just before the more major life transitions is kind of resting up and waiting to figure out what is going to develop.

But, mom has slowed down a bit and the big moves ended when my hubby and I bought our home in Sheboygan, WI last summer.  I no longer keep an eye on what my daughters are doing, but instead try to keep from laughing hysterically when they tell me what their children are doing (and probably shouldn't be).

In short, I am 63 and hubby is 61.  He is aiming for retirement at 62 and I want him to do just that.  But, mom has been a bit more quiet than usual because we are looking at a huge transition and, quite frankly, there's a whole lot of uncertainty about many things in this country today.  All of them lead to questions of what we will be able to do financially so we swim instead of sink.

Steve is my hubby and we have been married for six years this August.  So, I suppose it could be said that we are still just a bit in the honeymoon period - or at least on the close fringes.  We get along like two peas in a pod and we work like a well-oiled team with little discussion about the right or wrong way to do something.  So, unlike many of my friends in my age group, I have no need or desire to run to a therapist to figure out how to stand being around him day in and day out.  I am truly looking forward to it.

We know one thing for sure.  Living on retirement income will keep us afloat, but it will not come anywhere near allowing us to be long-distance swimmers.  So, we started a business.  As he works toward the day he can tell his boss, "I quit!" with a big grin on his face, he is also now working in our basement to create the best ever 100% soy candles.  He is enjoying this new life of his and, I must say, he's got just the touch.  I guess you could say you all heard it here first - "Home Lite Candles - Warming Hearts & Homes One Candle At A Time".  No, this really isn't an advertisement.  Until we get our home base of customers settled, we will be doing business locally.  Hopefully, we will see shipping down the road.

Upstairs, I have done battle with Excel to set up inventory records, promotional costs, etc. and stringing little beads on each end of that stretchy gold cord to put around the neck of the candle jars.  Why would I do that?  Just because.  It adds a little zip and the little "Thank You" card on each one is just another touch.  We want our customers to feel special.

So, along with doing a few things online, we are starting yet another journey and this will be even more fun for me because I will be taking this trip with my very best friend.  

What we both know is that no major life transition is ever really easy.  If nothing else, it kind of shags us out of our current complacency (or stupor) and forces us to see what we've still got to make life work.  Instead of getting so upset we feel paralyzed and can't move with all the recent "goings-on" here in the States, we have made the decision to take a proactive approach instead of a reactive kind of life.    

We don't really know yet how things will shake down with health care, what the cost will really be, what our options will wind up being as the dust settles somewhere down the road.  At our ages, that is a paramount consideration and we can't just ignore it. But, to sit around grumping and fuming and allowing ourselves to become paralyzed waiting for someone else to tell us what to do and how to live, will only cause us to sink harder and faster.

So, here comes another major transition in life.....This should be fun....