Understanding Loneliness

“Sometimes you need to be alone. Not to be lonely, but to enjoy your free time being yourself.” —Anonymous

Each of us have our own cross to bear in this tedious thing we call life.

Some of us will arguably deal with considerably more ups and downs than others.

I strongly believe that our burdens are not designed to break us, but to give us the strength to carry on.

With that said, we are also designed to participate in fellowship with those around us.

Albeit good, bad, or indifferent!

Once upon a time, interacting with the wor

ld around us helped to build our character and appreciate those closest to us.

However, many of us have become withdrawn from the day-to-day relationships we once valued so dearly.

It has become far easier for us to emotionally separate ourselves from daily life and hide out of sight.

We tend to wear masks to prevent those around us from seeing who we really are.

The desire to be anonymous has become the facade that we believe is our internal strength.

However, we ultimately fall short of our true nature and come up lacking.

It is here that we find ourselves in a pit of despair and loneliness.

What Is Loneliness

Many of us enjoy our time that we spend alone; however, loneliness is a different beast.

Spending time alone can feel restorative and perhaps even advantageous in some respects.

Many of us tend to use our time alone to create, reflect, or simply to relax.

Nevertheless, loneliness can affect us no matter the level social interaction we endure.

The nature of loneliness can be transient, situational, or chronic.

Some of us experience loneliness in sporadic episodes that come and go daily, weekly, or other in consistent manner.

On the other hand, situational loneliness tends to affect us at certain times such as the date of a significant loss, holidays, and similar times.

Many of us experience chronic loneliness almost every day …. all day.

Furthermore, loneliness is perceived to have varying levels of intensity as we endure an episode.

We can be affected by three different flavors of loneliness: emotional, existential, and social.

The lack of a close attachments or meaningful relationships often leads to our feeling an emotional loneliness.

Existential loneliness surrounds our maintaining separation from people in general.

Whereas social loneliness is based on our maintaining a limited social circle of friends and associates.

Some people minimize the amount energy it requires to host a large circle of acquaintances.

Techniques to Battle Loneliness

There are a number of methods that we can deploy for dealing with loneliness; however, we must first identify the source of our loneliness.

For example, emotional and existential loneliness may require professional help to get us on the right path to coping with loneliness.

Having a professional listen to us allows express our feelings of loneliness by sharing with someone.

These sessions can give us validation and help us to open up as we speak freely when we otherwise would not.

We can begin battling loneliness by creating a checklist of things that we can enjoy or do not mind doing alone.

Surrounding ourselves with people does not guarantee any protections against feelings of loneliness.

Using loneliness as an opportunity to know and understand ourselves better is always a check in the positive column.

Taking a walk in the park, dining out, or catching movie alone does not have to be perceived as a bad thing.

Alone time can teach us to regulate our emotions without depending on a relationship or connecting to do so.

Hanging around like-minded people is another great way for us to cope with bouts of loneliness.

Book clubs, Sip and Paint events, and volunteering are additional ways to deal with loneliness.

Opportunities like these allows us to interact with others without necessarily making friends.

However, it is a plus if we do!

Another technique for dealing with loneliness is participating in physical activities to stimulate our senses.

Fitness and exercise are great activities, but sports, hiking, and cycling helps to focus on sensations within the body.

Continue Moving Forward

Loneliness is often believed to be a temporary state; however, that is only if we actively pursue solutions.

Understanding the difference between solitude and loneliness is the key to moving forward from a desolate place.

Solitude is often a choice where we decide to be alone, while loneliness affects us at a much deep state of mind.

Stepping out and forging new bonds when in a strange place is helpful.

Building relationships beyond those that are strictly intimate are useful and encourage growth.

Take the opportunity to get out into the sun and get plenty of fresh air to stimulate the senses.

The only thing preventing us from moving forward is ourselves.

Canty