My Dating-Inspired Epiphany

9
2.3K followers
Updated

Wow! It's hard to believe summer's over and we're getting well into fall here in this part of the world. Although, I haven't blogged since July 1st, I've been doing my best to keep up with the new improvements (thanks Carson and Kyle!) that have constantly been coming at us.

Thank G-d, I had a wonderfully busy summer between visiting my family back home in Toronto, voluntarily running an English language program in camp in Russia, attending my cousin's Bar Mitzvah in New Jersey, a friend's wedding in London and hopping over to Israel! In fact, I just got back last night and I'm really excited to be preparing for my move to Los Angeles next week, G-d willing!

Needless to say, WA and Project SWAG have fallen by the wayside during this time. While I'm not happy about, in a way it was a conscious decision and I don't regret that; I just know I'll have to work super hard moving forward.

My Recent Dating-Inspired Epiphany

I would like to share with you something that I journaled a few days ago:

"It’s 1:25 am on Sunday, September 14, 2014 and I’m taking note of this moment. Far too many times over the last few years I’ve made the decision that this is the moment of change. But inspiration comes and goes and ultimately, I found excuses to take back my promise. I thought I was ready to be committed, but I guess that I wasn’t. I probably said these exact words to myself every single time, but this time is different. For real. And here’s why:

I had an experience this week that’s really changed my thought process and hence, subsequent actions. I was on a second date with a guy that I thought I might like. It was a blind date that my cousin had set up and I was really enjoying myself. I had flown in to Israel (where the guy is living) from London (where I was visiting for a friend’s wedding) to meet him, and the night after our second date I emailed my parents an update. In a nutshell, he is pretty much everything I am looking for in a guy. [Note: I date the ultra-orthodox way :). ]

The next day, I spoke to the ‘go-between’ who was arranging our dates and she told me that unfortunately, he feels like we’re not on the same page and she suspects that he feels like I know much more than him.

Granted, he’s from a small town in Northern England, while I am a Torontonian who has visited 13 countries and lived in 5. Granted, he sits and learns all day, sheltered by the environment he’s in, while I have been out and about, experiencing more than most people will ever discover. And granted, our different countries hold of different standards. But as a whole, I disagree with him. I don’t think we’re on totally different pages. Perhaps he is at the top of a page, while I am closer to the bottom; but we’re both written in pencil, easily erasable and rewritable, should be willing to review and revise. And I am.

I don’t know what will happen from here, but I do know that it got me thinking.

I know that there are certain things I have said and certain things I do that cause him to hesitate and while I say that I am willing to change in those areas, there is absolutely nothing I have done to demonstrate this. Perhaps I need to start working on those changes and then, in the future, should this ever be a potential issue again, I can confidently say that it is in the past.

So, the next day, after discussing this with a friend, I cancelled my ---- account. Here I was paying for a service that in my heart of hearts I knew I didn’t even want. I was wasting away hours doing something that I didn't really care about and that were holding me back me from working on and accomplishing my real goals and dreams.

Why This Time Will Be Different

Every once in a while, I get this sincere desire to commit to a project and become a success story. And each time I think that this is the moment and therefore, I can go all the way, totally revamping my writing and posting schedule, removing all other bad habits – essentially, thinking that I can be a superhero and do exactly what isn't realistic. Because each time I slip and make one mistake, suddenly, all those other attempts at staying on track go right out the window.

But, this time I'm not going to go all out and make ridiculous commitments to actions that are not within my reach considering my current responsibilities. So for now, I am simply committed to posting once a week on Project SWAG and doing my best to stay as active as possible within the WA community, without wasting time.

What Will You Do?

So, now I ask you - what will you do different this time? What's holding you back from moving forward and what can you change so that you can achieve what you set out to do rather than fall short and be hard on yourself?

I'd love to hear from you below...

I'm excited to be back and looking forward to spending time around here :)

Cheers,

Stephanie

Login
Create Your Free Wealthy Affiliate Account Today!
icon
4-Steps to Success Class
icon
One Profit Ready Website
icon
Market Research & Analysis Tools
icon
Millionaire Mentorship
icon
Core “Business Start Up” Training

Recent Comments

13

Something positive toward my online business every day ... someday its a little thing ... somedays it more ... but at least one tiny little positive step each day! M

That's definitely the right attitude! Slow and steady wins the race :)

I am comfortable with posting every two weeks. I am slowing down my posts. As for your dating experience, if you are from Toronto and he is in Israel, I am not a fan of long distance dating. And you know what? I've dated a few guys from other cultures, and I always found they were much more into their cultures, not westernized at all, and that always eneded up being a problem.

Yeah, I totally hear you on the culture issue.

And regarding Toronto-Israel, like I mentioned, we date very differently from most 'normal' people :) . We don't date for more than a few weeks (average) and there really wouldn't be much long distance dating involved. But, it's in the past and I'm totally ok with that!

Hi, I am single and happy the way it is for now. Plus it gives me the time to devote to my site and my son especially.
Kim :)

I hear you :) !

Cheers girl! :)

Stephanie, it's nice to see you here. :)

Sometimes things are just not meant to be. I personally feel when you meet the right one, there should be sparks between the both of you from the beginning and no doubts. He said those things because you're young, cute, well traveled, and educated and I think he was a little intimidated by that. You want someone who can relate to you and there is someone out there for you.

As for cancelling your account at WA, (1 light tap on the head) lol I think it's a thought we all have at one time or another. I'm glad your hanging in there and doing what you can when you can.

For me, I've upped my time on my site and seeing my results pay off. I made a commitment to myself that I want to working from home and be successful doing it. It's not easy either, because life can get in the way, but I do it anyway.

Thanks for your open heartfelt post. I wish you the best! Evelyn.

Thank you, Evelyn!

No, no - I didn't mean cancel my WA account. It was actually my Hulu account! I was wasting so much time watching TV shows I wasn't even interested in...

But, yeah, people say that when you meet the right one, you just know... I guess I'll have to wait and see ;)

While in my circles I'm considered to be 'getting old' - I just turned 22! - I'm super happy to be taking advantage of my single life and I know that I'm actually quite young :) . Thank G-d, I'm not the type of girl to get down on myself based on other peoples' opinions and expectations of what I should or shouldn't be doing!

Kudos to you on all you've been doing so far!

Cheers, Stephanie

Sorry I missed understood! I deserve a slap on the head for that one. lol I'll take the slap back on the head. lol and pat you on the back for getting rid of Hulu. I'm glad you're a strong girl. You're right 22 is very young and you got plenty of time to find him.

:-) You made me laugh with that one!

See more comments

Login
Create Your Free Wealthy Affiliate Account Today!
icon
4-Steps to Success Class
icon
One Profit Ready Website
icon
Market Research & Analysis Tools
icon
Millionaire Mentorship
icon
Core “Business Start Up” Training