Finding the guts to keep going
Things have just come to a halt on my end. Funt times. Not sure where to start regarding how it all got to that: an internal struggle for some time now, but waning somewhere. I might as well be honest about myself here: I have issues with depression and anxiety at times, so it's difficult to start a conversation about it, but since this has probably been the only community where I've seen some immediate support, I figure to just put this out for anyone wondering where I've been in the last couple months or so.
I've never been one to say that life is simple, because the way I see it--it isn't. Perhaps at some point it was, or I believed it to be, but that's likely such a long time ago, it could be considered an entire lifetime ago.
I've been ruminating, and procrastinating for some time now, toying over with how to go about attacking this (all of what I have on my plate, not just the depression and anxiety) and so I just opted to hit the ground running, being a little more wary of the pitfalls this time.
But there's something different this time too...
I've never been one to really ask for help, and only recently have I started to reach out to people, face to face. So with that said, I think I need to find a mentor. Or group of mentors that can help guide me along the way. I don't want to be inactive in something I'm actively investing in, and not seeing results.
I believe in this system, based off of what I'm seeing. The issue, is me.
I need help. So anyone willing, I'm willing. I have ideas, I have the desire, the drive, and that little bit of crazy to go all the way. Just not the plan, or some of the finer details.
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Do you have any goals? Or just expecting something to happen?
When you have a goal, you become motivated to do something about it.
You could have a goal of getting out of depression. or of helping someone that needs help in some way.
Depression is usually result of thinking about self and not thinking about how you might help someone else.
Yeah I've been coming around to that, or some form of it. The goal I started with was to have a certain amount of income reached, and I think I stopped detailing it out. I was never expecting something to just happen.
I've a written out plan, that I'm updating. That was around the time I started falling off.
I have this job where I work a third shift, and I've never been the type that lasts doing overnights. The lack of sleep takes my thinking in directions that aren't very sound. I think it's a series of factors--not just thinking about myself--that led to falling off.
But it did start with me.
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When I hit this point, I usually take a day, or two, then I start watch video training, read blogs, more training...
and I write. Even if I don't post, I start with an idea and go with it.
I have also found speech to text in Google Docs, easier to 'free flow', and then edit.
Hope this helps.
Shaunna
Thanks! Yeah, I've been writing like crazy, there's no other space where I can express that. Wish I had the funding already to just create.