They may be a pain, but they are someone else's referral

Last Update: April 09, 2019

One thing I have noticed this week is that people have been pointing out to me that so-and-so is also is not looking at the training and they just asking random questions.

I totally agree that some people can be a pain and yes they not listen to you and just rambling on and not knuckling down to getting the training done.

You never know where somebody else's in their journey. You don't know what point there are and where they want to go. What you do know is that every one of these people who are starter members are potentially somebody's referral.

If there questions no matter how inane are handled incorrectly then it is possible that they will not go on to be a premium member.I know that if they were my referral I would want to treat them with respect. Everybody else's referral deserves that without judgement.

Some people are frightened about joining a community and I just testing the waters to see if they can validate their own opinion of whether this site is real or not. Maybe they're validating whether or not you can make money online. Maybe there's a hundred other reasons why the rate they are asking a question

Another thing I have noticed in question time is people (again multiple people) who don't tell the complete truth when answering a question. I'm not saying or criticising the shortened version. I am pointing out the times when people say things that is absolutely incorrect.

There is probably two schools of thought on this. I would very much appreciate your comments on both points. My view is that lying to people doesn't help in the short term or the long term. What do you think?

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Dedo52 Premium
Interesting Post Catherine,

Due diligence in any area of life is essential and reveals the amount of responsibility a person has.

The WA forum is not unlike any other (apart from its gentleness and integrity)
Meaning: They are ideal places to garner ideas and also get into the minds of the contributors. After all, what we project is but an essence of who we are?
So, in summary, it's a training platform amongst other things. And I, for one, wouldn't put my trust in someone who has the experience of a neophyte.
What says you?

Cordially
Dedo
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sdawson Premium
No way is a lie helpful and we should never do that. We also need to be sure that we are not leaving something important out (i.e, WA is not FREE - the 7 day trial week is FREE). Actually, the trial week is awesome and the 10 lessons that are part of it are wonderful and that should sell itself. I try to go into detail about the 7 day trial week when I talk about it.
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webcash2us Premium
Hi Kat,
I definitely think we have the ups and downs of both truth and an accidental lie on this platform. I think an accidental lie may happen when a premium member that's trying to rank will answer a question thinking they have the right answer.

To new members it must get confusing at times because they will go into chat to ask one question and get 6 different answers from 6 different premium members all trying to rank with what they think is the right answer.

That leaves the person sitting there wondering what to do and confused. I've had people PM me to sort through their problems, I've helped a few, but who has the time to help people consistently when you have your own work to do.

I think it's strange that to be a certified commenter in site comments you have to do 50 comments approved, but for chat you can teach people before you ever finish the first lesson of training, even if your teaching them the wrong answers.

I don't do as much in chat, mostly because of time to do my own work, but I have seen both in chat and in the comments dashboard the wrong answers given.

I know when I first started I was one of those guys giving whatever answer I could find just to try to help and of course to rank here at WA.

I see newbies asking questions all the time about how to do certain things to their sites and when you go to their profiles they haven't done much if any of the training.

That is a problem if you ask me, even if they make the site look nice they will still fail with the lack of complete knowledge and they will wind up quitting complaining the platform doesn't work.

Sadly it seems many try to avoid doing the lessons and rely on the community to teach them the way to success. While it may seem harsh, I say do the training and you will learn the process.

All The Best
John
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TheCatherine Premium
Thanks John. Interesting comments about the comments and chat. I had not realised that. It does seem odd.
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DCDT Premium
I think this is definitely an area of concern. I would hope that no one would intentionally lie; I think that would only lead to distrust and dissatisfaction.

I do agree that people get frustrated with questions that will be answered by the training, and while I certainly understand that frustration, it's also a bit disheartening for an enthusiastic newbie to just be shot down with an abrupt "go do the training". I have read enough of those questions/answers that I just avoid asking questions if at all possible. I'm assuming the answers are in in the training and I'll learn them eventually--and I don't want to get smacked down and get my feelings hurt, know what I mean?

I'm not sure what the right answer is. But certainly truth or a simple I don't know would be preferable to a lie.

Thanks for raising this issue.

Brooke
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TheCatherine Premium
I am not sure the answer is to shoot them down and do the training but it appears I am in the minority. But hey it won't be the first time, or the last
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NidaV Premium
Thank you for your post. I hope people (especially those that one signed up under) will be mindful enough not to criticize, be judgmental and to find time to listen and ask question to clarify if unsure of what the new member is asking.

This industry is very challenging to a lot of beginners as there are a lot who came from different industries. Some are also technically challenged.

I am passionate about your topic which I want to raise as a concern to Kyle because it was something I encountered myself in which instead of boosting my confidence it got dampened.

Take care,

Nida
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TheCatherine Premium
Nida
That is such a shame and I am so sorry. It is something that does need to be raised with Kyle.
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Marley2016 Premium
Catherine,

Thank you for this blog post! This is one of the reasons I no
longer help in Live Chat anymore. Not that I ever really wanted
to Stop. But the responses to questions need to be the
truth and I have seen many members giving half-truths or
telling new members to go do the training.

I agree with you 100% - if you are going to help in Live Chat
then answer the questions truthfully to the best of your
ability. I have actually answered members with I do not know!
Because that was the truth, experience sometimes enables
us to answer questions that we could not answer prior but
until I know the right answer I prefer to give the I do not know
one ::))

Thanks again,
Susan
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TheCatherine Premium
I don't think there's anything wrong with the I do not know answer. I frequently do that if I'm the only one in chat and someone asked about hosting here I am usually clueless. I don't host here because when I join wealthy affiliate's they didn't have any hosting. Over the years I have far too many blogs to move so although I could host some of them here I can't host all of them. So it's simpler to leave them somewhere else
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Debs66 Premium
2007 this lady has been active in W.A. Thats 13 years hope I got my Maths right lol I will stand to be corrected. Easy.

Imagine all the many changes Kat has seen over those years. Lol I got to see the new UX in Beta. Kat has seen the whole growth of W.A,

W.A started in 2005 was it Kat I think it was.

There you go Kat thats my thoughts. I wonder if they could do the years you have. I agree with you by the way.

Debs :)
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TheCatherine Premium
well in some respects it seems as though I've been here forever. Sometimes I feel like a dinosaur. There are not that many members here who are still active who can remember when this was the keyword site. There was no training to be an affiliate just a list of keywords. Even I can't remember how often whether it was once a week or once a month.

I have to say I'm often corrected because I give an answer that was correct somewhere between the Jurassic age and the Cretaceous era.

Fortunately, I'm not afraid to be wrong and not afraid to apologise for being wrong afterwards. My husband always used to say had to take me twice everywhere,At least once to apologise
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Debs66 Premium
Lol I love the last bit Kat with your husband. . Nothing wrong with a bit of Feisty lol. :)
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TheCatherine Premium
yes, that's one of the saddest things about being a widow. I don't have to be dragged there twice to apologize!
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Debs66 Premium
Oh Kat I am so sorry. I didn't know. Sending you a big E-Hug. x
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jeanetteobas Premium
One thing we learned in school is there are no stupid questions. People interpret things differently so they may ask questions because they genuinely don't understand something.

On the other hand. I was and still am skeptical being here and probably will be until I see my handwork pay off. That doesn't stop me from encouraging others to follow their training and do their best for success but this is just because people before me seem to have such great success.

I don't know that part of it yet and am still fairly new here, but I think telling the truth from the beginning could only serve to help people not hinder them. We don't want to give people false hope or mislead them so I am clear when I say "I'm still new here" so I am not faced with trying to answer questions I don't know the answers to.

If that makes sense.

Thanks for sharing. Sorry for the long reply.
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TheCatherine Premium
thank you for your insights. It is interesting to see that even though you may be set skeptical you have still become a premium member. For my two pennyworth I think That everyone who has succeeded here have done so because they have not given up on because they ask questions.
that's a quick answer but in truth some of them, have had to change their niche sometimes after more than a year because some leashes are more profitable than others. It is true and you often read on here that every niche can be made profitable. Whilst that is true some earn pennies on the dollar and some earn 50 cents.
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Calh60 Premium
Good points. If I help someone I verify first before I type. Another thing to point out is, we want all the new folks to be accurate when they start out. If they start with bad habits they will have a tough time, thus, wanting to quit too soon.

Cal
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TheCatherine Premium
Lol it's easy enough to acquire bad habits when you been here for a long time without having them in the first place!
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TDomena Premium
Lying is never good, but I agree with the other members who have chimed in that often times, the people don't intend to lie. I think many times they're telling what they think is true, but don't have enough experience yet.
I have seen the other scenario you mentioned where people seem to tell half truths and don't completely help. For that, I think it's a little more intentional. Sometimes, it's used to spark interest so they can upsell a person thru PM or sometimes it's just lazy--neither is good.
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TheCatherine Premium
couldn't agree with you more,Tiffany
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Wolfe222 Premium
It's funny how so much of what my grandfather taught me, (during our long walks when I was a kid), is strangely all coming back to me as I'm growing older.

One of the things he told me was: "it's easier to remember the truth than to remember lies"...

Yes, we are definitely surrounded by many peoples who may lie or - because they don't know otherwise - may want to stretch the truth. The unfortunate thing is that until otherwise proven or found, we have to take what peoples say AS the truth.

Now since I joined this community expecting the truth from others, I've definitely made sure to keep the truth on my lips and comments.

to our success!

Marc
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TheCatherine Premium
we can only work towards it. In my case, being authentic is definitely work in progress. As I age I spend more time contemplating it and more time trying to be compassionate to others. The replies to this post would indicate that I still sometimes fail
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marchanna Premium
How do we know if they are lying? Maybe they are also ignorant :)

Just kidding. A little.

If people have time to be monitoring the training of other people they barely know and comment upon it, whether they tell them the truth, complain about it, or even lie to them -- well, they are wasting their time getting too involved. Simply answer the question as best as possible, refer them to a training, or don't answer if knowing is known.

However, some people act like they know a lot and move up the rankings in WA, without knowing a thing about actually being successful marketers and without accomplishing such.

Instead, such individuals should be working on their own websites and training and most importantly, their own mindset for success, rather than worrying about others reasons for acting the way they are or concerned about rankings via excessive and random conversation in blog posts or chat.

And I'm sorry to disagree on principal, but respect is earned through observation and awareness of of good deeds, not given unequivocally just because someone is hanging around as a new member.

Be polite, yes. Respect later, if deserved.
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Robert-A Premium
I'm with you on what you say Marc.
Sometimes I wonder how on earth some people actually get any work done because they are more interested in their rank.

Also most of the advice they give is not worth a dam and does more harm than good.
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marchanna Premium
spot on, brother!

I'm glad to be following you,as you offer truly useful stuff when you blog, and I'm happy you are on the ambassadorial plane for us all!
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Robert-A Premium
I do my best and so far, so good as they say.
Now I'm off for the night.
Robert
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TheCatherine Premium
Yes as always something to reflect o n
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TheCatherine Premium
So well put Robert. Sadly though the newbies can't have the info or experience to cut through that crap. In fairness half the time I don't thin the people who offer it know how wrong they are half the time
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kpercival55 Premium
Well said Kat!
Lying is never ok.
However giving a partial answer so that one learns how and where to find information on their own is acceptable in my opinion. Too much hand-holding only cripples one in the long run.
Just my thoughts, some may not agree.
Thanks for opening the discussion.

KyleAnn
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TheCatherine Premium
Thank you Kyle Ann other things to reflect on
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NewLaurie Premium
Hi Kat,

Some folks tend to pepper the platform with questions immediately after joining, when it is obvious that they haven't even had a cursory look at the training or resources here.

Others seem to spend hours asking fellow members how fast they can expect to make money and when and how they can get paid. They've joined WA, but rather than acquainting themselves with the material, they want fellow members to continue reassuring and selling them on it.

New members' successes will be based entirely on what they bring to the table (talent, effort, attitude), and not what other members may or may not be achieving. While success stories are inspirational, it can be a trap to get caught up in how others are doing, to the detriment of one's own projects.

It's also important the be gently realistic with people. This is a self-directed training and hosting platform, with the addition of community support.

It's not a one-on-one coaching system.

While they may find a mentor who is willing to do this, this is the exception, not the norm, and they should be prepared to put in plenty of individual effort.

Brand new members should be welcomed politely, and reminded to get started with the training material (which covers almost every question, step-by-step).

Of course, if they need clarification on something specific, we're here to help.
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TheCatherine Premium
Some people want validation before they can get clarification and who knows when and where they will get it
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NewLaurie Premium
It's important to be polite. And it's lovely to be helpful. But there is not obligation on the part of fellow members to provide "validation". Some might say that's coddling.
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TheCatherine Premium
Why not provide validation if that is what needed. I don't think that anyone can know why others need validation, whats the difference between that and help? There is no obligation on any of us to give anything at all, but if we can't give what is needed why are we bothering at all?
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SnazzyIT Premium
I agree, sometimes it is exhausting just trying to explain to someone, who wants to jump to the end of training without starting at the beginning, to be patient and work through it.
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TheCatherine Premium
it is exhausting completely exhausting, it is exasperating at times. It doesn't mean that I don't remember the times I made the same mistakes. I'm sure to some degree the majority of people here did the same thing.

It would also be fair to say that different people need different approaches so coddling one group of people might be damaging to them but beneficial to others.

multiple approaches probably is the key.
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suzzziq Premium
I totally agree with you that everyone still needs to be treated with respect because they are someone’s referral:)

I sent a link to someone I met on Instagram several weeks ago, but instead of going through my link, she saw the words,”Wealthy Affiliate.com” before my affiliate ID, and went directly to the site.

I’m not sure who picked her up, but she still emails me with questions. I still answer kindly, but I’m really hoping that her “mentor” will kick in, and start helping out!

I always try to be respectful of everyone, because that is how I would want to be treated:)

Blessings:)
Suzi
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TheCatherine Premium
That is a point Suzi some people are great at helping their referrers ,others less so. I applaud the respectful to everyone
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lynnsam61 Premium
There is no such thing as a dumb question provided the person has tried to figure it out themselves first. Some things that seem obvious to some people just aren't to others. I agree that you never know what stage someone is at in their journey. But it's just wrong to volunteer a misleading answer or an incomplete answer to any question.

Erica
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TheCatherine Premium
Yes we all learn at different paces and in different ways. I often ask a question because I won't watch a video. I must be the only person in the planet who doesn't watch YouTube videos
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Coraliej Premium
Great thoughts. I also want to say thank you.
In the short time I have been with WA, I have run into some roadblocks along the way.
I wasn’t sure at first about how the community reall would be about helping people. I have to say I’m unbelievably blown away by this group of people.
Thank you.
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TheCatherine Premium
I gave to say the help from this community is amazing
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HaroldLngfrd Premium
I’ve been gone for awhile and so I’m not sure what brought this conversation to light, with that said, I’m not sure if I’m in the right place to say this but I will. People need to stop focusing on what someone else is doing and focus on themselves. Yes, there are times we may have to critique a fellow student’s work and that’s the only time you should focus on someone else other than yourself. We are all here to learn, grow and be prosperous. You can’t do any of those things if you’re totally focused on everyone else.

When I first came to Wealthy Affiliate, my attitude and emotions were not in the right place. I spent hundreds of hours typing, watching videos, creating so much content and you know what? It was all garbage!!! Why? Because my heart wasn’t in it to win it. But if you look at any of my posts here on WA prior to today, you would see someone who has been around the block a few times, yet there’s no true substance to anything I discussed because my passion wasn’t in it, it was going in the opposite direction in real time. And so, I say, if you don’t know what your passion is, maybe you should take a moment and reflect inwards, there lies all of the answers...
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Dedo52 Premium
Great comment Harold !
I wrote a similar comment on a previous post

Cordially
Dedo
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TheCatherine Premium
That is obviously a popular thought but I would still like my referrals to be treated with respect
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HaroldLngfrd Premium
i wasn't sure whose referrals they were, After a 2 yeat hiatus, I just re established my connection with WA, because I missed everyone here and I've gotten myself together with a new purpose . I gonna set good things in motion!!!
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Vapz Premium
OK, without getting emotional, I would want to say thank you.

I almost thought humanity was running down that inhumane lane where we don't care about others because we have nothing to gain from them.

Thank you for reassuring me that it isn't so. Thank you so much.
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TheCatherine Premium
You are welcome
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Debbie46 Premium
Thanks for the observation katkatskitchen. I think one of the best ways to go is to refer to trainings. I have received that response to my questions and they help quite a lot.
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TheCatherine Premium
Sounds z great approach to me
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bazboy247 Premium
About time some one brought this up
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TheCatherine Premium
It's not the first time I have brought it up and I doub that if it will be the last. If one person rethinks their approach then as fas as I am concerned I am done. Thanks Baz
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seesy62 Premium
They have the full opportunity to join FOR free and have 2 free websites, those or cheap lazy curious bastards and nothing but a waste of time, AND there is thousands of them!!
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TheCatherine Premium
That's my point exactly. That is a value judgement
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Hudson Premium
This is a really interesting post. I know for sure that at the beginning of my time at WA and hopefully less now I also ask questions which show some naivety on my part. I usually spend some time trying to find the answer before asking. I would think in this age of instant information some newer (?) members might not take the time to look closely but just ask. One way round this would be to have an index to the training overall but this is a large job to keep this up to date. I have seen instances where this has worked in other companies (vendors not affiliate type companies) and some examples are superb. As we don’t have this I guess we have to just be patient and help everyone as much as we can. I absolutely agree with your point that lying is something we should never do. I often don’t know the answer and will say so rather than lying. Great post, great food for thought.
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TheCatherine Premium
Thank you for your perspective. From mine I think that a directory would be confusing. I have a list of hundreds of trainings, I have tagged and bookmarked and that helps me to quickly point someone in the best direction
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Hudson Premium
Thanks, that’s a great idea, will try this myself.
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TheCatherine Premium
It helps me get to info fast
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Nadia27 Premium
It is better not to reply to question. But lying is awful and really not necessary. And above all no body oblige anyone to answer. If you do not wish to answer just pass it.
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TheCatherine Premium
Yes that's true.
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phil1944 Premium
I like the ones that post "I have a problem. Can anyone help?"

Tempted to reply "You might have to wait until the resident mind reader comes back online."

But we don't, of course. We patiently ask "What's the nature of your problem? How can we help?"

It's one of the things that make WA such a great community.
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TheCatherine Premium
Yes often they don't know how to frame the question. They don't have enough knowledge to ask if and I remember that well
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SWhitley Premium
I have been known to ask some really dumb questions. Sometimes I just can't find the answer in the training and sometimes because I just can't quite understand the answer, even after putting it aside and coming back to it later.

I seem to be lucky in that the answers I'm given are usually short and to the point, which is what I need. And when training is referenced, I'll find it is from a source I have not looked at.


Lying is never good. It decreases YOUR credibility. Of course, there is a thing called tact...
Walking the Path of Peace, Sanders
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TheCatherine Premium
So glad you have got your answers and the only dumb question us one you don't ask. That's the point if live chat.it gives the opportunity to answer in another way
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Robert-A Premium
Hi Catherine

My biggest bugbear is that people will ask a question but not say exactly what it is they want to do or what exactly their problem is.

Of course a lot of those members are brand new to working online, building a website, working with online tools, and even just integrating with other people as a whole or just one on one but surely they know that the more detailed their question the better the answer will be.

I personally have given a 500 word reply via a PM and they still come back and ask what do I mean by this, that or the other.

However I will continue to help as best as I can simply because we have all been where they are and I like to help anyway.

Have a great Tuesday Catherine and be successful.
Robert
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TheCatherine Premium
Robert you always give your best. My favourite is when I dictate a 500 word answer and then realize I gave not answered the correct question. Then I have to say shall I answer that with a brain cell engaged. I am not perfect either. Fortunately
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Robert-A Premium
I do my humble best as you do Catherine.
Sometimes though you could pull your hair out in exasperation when they don't seem to 'Get It', but hey I don't have much now anyway lol.
Onwards and upwards.
Robert
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Twack Premium
Totally agree on all points. A question placed is only the part we see...we don't always know the motivation behind it.
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TheCatherine Premium
that's absolutely true but we don't know what is causing them to ask a question. Maybe they are just testing the waters to see if this site is valid and by dismissing them we dismiss any hope of making the premium
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MONDOS Premium
Absolutely correct Catherine. I agree with you. As premium member, each one of us must help any starter members come our way even if they are not our referrals. We want to build a better and bigger community of online entrepreneur here at WA. Paul.
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TheCatherine Premium
thank you, Paul.starter members are starter members whether there are referrals Or not. It's up to us all we have collective responsibility to bring them onto premium
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