The #1 Reason There's Complaints About Wealthy Affiliate Reviewers!

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Here are two quotes I want you to ponder--they explain my point, and I want you to keep these in mind as you're reading and responding to this post...

One says, "A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." (Proverbs 15:1)

And, the other says:

“I speak the truth. Not everyone who says they are ready to hear it really are.”
Monika Zands

Do you hear the difference in those two? The truth is honest, and the truth is always going to be the best way to go, but the truth can be delivered in consideration. Too often, we pair the truth with characteristics like:

  • Blunt
  • Real
  • and, "Telling it like it is"

But, sometimes, when we carry it along like that, we can also be inconsiderate, careless, rude, foul, and unfortunately, downright foolish. It's foolish to make statements without consideration of the consequences, and sometimes, by not taking into account the full picture (the action and its results), we find ourselves living with the climate we've created with our words for days, months, years, decades, and in some cases, even generations!

Take a Look at Some Common Idioms we Use

Haven't you heard these sayings?

  • They chewed my head off
  • They lashed out on me
  • They jumped down my throat
  • Or, they tore into me

Why do you think we use these words to describe how words feel to us? Could it be because the words literally crush the spirit? While it's not a physical experience that the words describe, the words still carry with them painful responses that can linger with spiritual scarring for long periods--so bad that a parent can transfer the pain to their children and on and on.

Look at the turmoil we have in our world! Alot of it came as a result of this simple principle: we don't know how to give a gentle answer, but instead speak harsh words and stir up wrath. It goes back to the most basic advice we give our toddlers very very early on, "be nice". Isn't it a simple principle, but so hard to enact? Those 4 letter "N I C E" present quite the challenge, don't they?

What's Nice Mean?

You don't have to be told to "be mean" or to "be brash"--it comes pretty naturally. Haha.

Unfortunately, nice has the wrong perception. We don't have to be:

  • Overly tolerant
  • a Runover
  • Lacsadaisakal (is that how you spell that? Haha)
  • Turning a "blind eye" to things that are wrong
  • Or, absent of boundaries just because we're nice.

We can still be assertive and clear, but being nice can be a huge key to improving how others view this community, the affiliate marketing industry, the internet marketing industry, your family, you as a person, and everything you do. We could literally be nice and change this industry as a result! We could shift the industry culture.

I have to admit, I'm not always nice. I wish I was, but it's something I strive for in my reviews, in my interaction, and everywhere and in everything that I do. It is hard sometimes though, so I can relate to those that struggle to be nice. I can feel the tension within myself sometimes, but I also see the positive payoff when I persevere thru it, and decide to be nice rather than do what would make my flesh feel best at the moment. What about you?

How to Add a Spice of Nice into Our Reviews

This same principle that applies to our reviews also applies in our day-to-day interaction with others, and often, our families are the ones we have the hardest time enacting this with. Studies show families are struggling severely, and a large part of that is because we're more focused on "being right" and "telling the truth" than being considerate and speaking with grace. Our divorce rates, criminal rates, depression, and neglect rates are proof this simple principle to "give soothing words" and "be nice" isn't at work enough.

Yes, there are scammers and they're doing people wrong. Yes, there are product creators that are creating less than quality products. Yes, you're spouse may be wrong. Yes, your kids may be "off the hook".

How to Approach a Bad Review with Consideration

They could be absolutely wrong, and sometimes, the scenarios make my blood boil to consider why they would do such a thing, but the truth is that they're intent will always be an unknown unless they tell it to us. We're not mind readers, and it's easy to become critical, accusatory, and assume their intent, and that's not right, is it?

Isn't there a way to shine the light on wrong behavior, steer potential victims clear, and still speak with consideration and grace?

Many of our reviews are true: one product is lesser quality than the other, but rather than considerately taking the time to point out advantages and disadvantages, and providing a thorough explanation, we say "Scam" and "Not recommended" without giving enough context or without building authority and trust.

It's possible that our reviews can serve more than one purpose: they can guide consumers to the best option AND they can help product and service creators to be a better version of themselves IF we deliver our reviews with tact.

How a Lack of Consideration Can Damage Reputations

I've heard people across the internet who have a stereotype of Wealthy Affiliate reviews. They think we put one product down to sell another, and rightfully so.

I understand that you see many awful products out there, but there has to be a way we can deliver our feedback in a constructive way.

Some Takeaways

Takeaway Assignment: Go back to your previous posts (especially bad reviews) and add a sprinkle of nice. Express empathy regardless of how pathetic you think the products are, and keep the internal hope that your kindness (even in bad reviews) could spark a positive change.

Takeaway QUOTES:

“It is the weak that expresses aggressiveness to show strength, but real strength, is in the gentle.”
― Nurudeen Ushawu

“If you have never walked a mile in someone’s shoes, do not mock the soars on his feet.”

― Matshona Dhliwayo

Now, it's Your Turn...

So, my question for you is:

  • How can we deliver a bad review with consideration of all parties?
  • How can we build more context, authority and trust with readers (even the product and service developers who may be unethical) for the potential that maybe we could benefit everyone with our observations?
  • How can we ensure that we play fair with our competition and don't gloss over their good attributes in our reviews?
  • How can we be more nice when we're being evangelists of products and services we believe in while there are others competing with us?
  • What do you think would happen if we approach our negative and positive reviews with more consideration? Don't you think we could have a more positive impact on the industries we're in?

From my previous interactions here, you all in this community are amazing geniuses that have taught me so much in the comments sections of my posts. Thanks for that! I can't wait to hear your answers to these questions. Sound off!

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Recent Comments

79

This is a great post on a very thought-provoking and practical topic. Being the editor that I am, I couldn't help looking up the word you mentioned, which is "lackadaisical" (what a word!! lol). Dictionary: adjective
without interest, vigor, or determination; listless; lethargic:
a lackadaisical attempt.
lazy; indolent:
a lackadaisical fellow.

As a professional editor, I have had to review people's writing and offer comments throughout my career (such as in Microsoft Word's Track Changes feature). I can say it is REALLY a fine line like you have explained here. The truth is important so that people learn from their mistakes or issues - but it DEFINITELY has to be done in a tone that can be received well to motivate the person instead of discourage them.

The simplest thing anyone can do when reviewing someone else's work - say "Please" and "Thanks!" often. Start with what's positive, and then use wording that is truthful but constructive. Avoid at all costs saying "Why did you do that?" or "You should have done this" - those are examples of very negative tone. Better to say "Please remember to do this according to this guideline" or "You might want to try doing this .." or "It would be better to try it this way for this reason - may I suggest .." and so on.

Thanks for a very important topic!

It's great to know who the editors are in the WA house! Haha. Thanks for expounding on the term--that's exactly what I meant. I agree about the fine line.

I see the fine line in my day-to-day interactions with my kids (amongst other things). I can correct them and crush their spirits or, I can correct them and empower them at the same time. My response can be the result of the same wrong deed, but it could make them convicted, repentant, and ready to improve, or broken, resentful, and ready to seclude themselves--simply based on my tact.

From my experience, the latter is never really a helpful resolution. Instead, it's best to elicit self-discovery and extend grace regardless of their deeds, and this doesn't have to detract from honesty, assertiveness, or willingness to accurately call something bad or wrong.

Thanks for sharing your opinion.

Excellent point! I am a bit ashamed to admit, I'm pathologically nice. I don't struggle being nice. While I haven't really reviewed many products on my site, I've been reviewing books for freaking ever on Amazon and Goodreads and the like. I'm always honest, but I'm always respectful. The only review that I can think of where I wasn't was a hugely 'successful' writer notorious for trying to game the KU system and I tried reading one of their books. The author is obviously a fake name (not even just a psuedonym, as even authors who write under other names you can find personal messages or their real name or something) and it was mediocre, ghostwritten BS. I don't mind ghostwriting in self-help or autobiographies or a line of books like VC Andrews who passed away but ghostwriters keep publishing new books as a tribute, but an author buying books to sell under their own name is deceptive. Anyway, I wasn't exactly nice but I didn't bash the author and I was speaking to readers and I was a little sarcastic.

Even negative reviews deserve some tact. You can tell the truth without being hurtful or nasty. I do prefer honesty and respectful reviewing where the product is discussed, and actual scam products don't deserve to have positive mentions, but you can say, "I'd steer clear of this one as it's a scam." Instead of "This is a horrible, horrible product no one should ever buy and the creator is evil and kills puppies!!"

Or similar. I never get personal with my reviews. I'm not reviewing the author. Im not giving the author constructive criticism. I'm speaking to potential consumers, right? But good authors and product and service creators WANT to improve themselves and negative reviews let them know where they can improve. A review full of sarcastic mean comments isn't helpful.

However, people purposely scamming other people or deceiving them... I'd probably get sarcastic more.

The world needs more people willing to show respect and consideration to others, even when reviewing the product negativity. Definitely agree 100% with that!

I can sense that you GET where I was coming from with this post totally. It's some balance that's needed. We need to be tasteful and respectful, but honest.

We don't need to call products bad for our personal gain, but for the consumer protection, and possibly even for the product creator's improvement.

Exactly!

I totally agree that the tone you take with a review is very important to your brand. It bothers me when I see a review of a product from someone at WA that appears to bash it and call it a scam when it's obvious from the lack of details that they haven't even seen what the actual program offers.

That being said, I think that there's no problem calling a spade a spade when you provide a thorough, fact-based review. In all of the MMO programs I've reviewed, there's very few that I've called out as an actual scam.

But as someone who lost thousands of dollars in a scam program years ago, I owe my readers full honesty based upon what a program claims and what they give you for your money. I look at it from a beginners viewpoint and use my experience to determine if someone could get the results claimed from buying the product.

I can't say that I don't get a bit sarcastic here and there when I come across something that's particularly bad and and obviously gives nothing for your money. But that's honest to me, and different than a ton of negative hype saying I'm exposing another scam!

If a naive, inexperienced person reads my review and feels my frustration with what a program offers based upon a thorough, fact-based assessment, I think I've done my job and don't feel bad for showing that negative emotion.

The fact is that our readers will learn who to trust to give them relevant facts and who is just bashing just to get ranked and promote their product. Which side of that fence you want to be on is the choice each individual has to make!

Janelle

I love your perspective. I think one key you pointed out is how you build context and authority by using your experience and explaining thoroughly what you see and why it isn't a good product. I think that's key.

I also think it's important to give full honesty. I'm aiming to encourage a little of it all: honesty, consideration, and context. I understand how and why you'd get sarcastic. I do it too.

In my opinion, I think it's important to build the authority before doing too much sarcasm otherwise, you can come off too biased too early on and diminish your credibility. What do you think?

I agree totally! It took me several months of writing reviews before I felt confident enough in my experience to put in a level of emotion, like sarcasm. But I still have to check myself sometimes, because I want my site and my brand to be seen as positive and fair.

I take a break from writing reviews for a week or so sometimes if I find myself getting into a negative mind frame from seeing all the bad programs out there. When I start writing them again, I feel I put out a much better review after that!

Me too! I mix my content up because it can make the world seem like such a dark place when you see too many bad programs and reviews back to back.

I agree with you that it takes product knowledge and confidence to step past the "this is bad and this is good" dialogue, but I think it's important to go that extra step.

Interesting post, Tiffany. I always know that I can count on you to bring up serious topics for discussion. This post is one of them. The training on here does make note of how to write a review in proper format. One thing I do know is be honest about another program and your blunt matter of fact opinion justifies why they need to be in WA. It wouldn't matter what I try to say in my blog because some will still buy the program. We don't want them to. It is up to them to spend tons of money on such programs we are reviewing. Our job is to convince them not to by show them how they can save their money and save all money by not buying into upsells just for one price one tiered price. Keep it simple. See how Jerry H does it. He wrote, “I hate upsells” then goes on to say he earns passive income and has prove so his marketing tactics works because he's honest. All of his reviews are bluntly honest and to the point and “straight shot to the gut” like ewolfanger 22 states. Nathaniel is the same way. He is so deft at dispelling the negative organic comments on his website.

I can always count on your to respond: whether you agree or disagree. I love that about you. Thanks for that. I'm definitely not saying to be dishonest. Just tactful that's all.

What sucks is I wrote a bad review for a product that I was still pushing as an affiliate. I wasn't mean, made sure I put in the positives and negatives of the product and explained why in my own personal opinion I felt this way. I am no longer an affiliate with them. They kicked me out of their affiliate program... I was definitely shocked about it.

Wow. Their loss, right? All you can do is try your best.

One potential side effect of bad reviews that don’t mix in a few drops of honey but a straight shot to the gut, is that the one whose product is being reviewed, is that the reviewer may no longer be considered a reliable source of partial opinions, and in fact, may no longer be considered at all.
The review that is delivered with no holds barred runs the risk of not only putting form over function, but form smothering function.

Great point! I love how you've called it "form smothering function"! That's pretty funny! Hahahaha.

Thanks, Domena. Since I am about to write a "bad" review, I will keep your words in mind.

Best wishes with that. Be the change you want to see!

A relative quote from my grandmother: "You catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar."

If we strive for objectivity, we can eliminate the personal bias that feeds our negativity. If the product we are reviewing really is a better product, it will speak for itself. All we have to do is point out its advantages over the competition. The review should focus on why our product is a better choice, not on why the competition is a worse choice.


Everybody loves to champion the underdog, so a negative review of the competition could backfire. Unless the competing product is demonstrably inferior and/or poses a health or safety hazard, give credit where it's due: "Product A does a good job of ________. However, in addition to ___________, product B also _______________."

If your negative review is based on personal opinion rather that fact, it can call into question the positive review of your product/service. If possible, it's a good idea to review a product on its own merits, rather than why it's better than another product. We can point out how our product eclipses industry standards without ever mentioning the name of a competing product.

In the final analysis, I think if we approach our interviews with a "good, better, best" attitude, we will come across as more objective to our readers. Who knows, for whatever reason, a customer may prefer the "better" to the "best." Thanks for yet another thought-provoking post.

I love the "good, better, best" approach, or "best for price range A", "best for price range B", or even "best for buying motive A" are ways I've seen objective reviews done that are more palatable. Thanks for pointing that out! That's a great way to go about it.

you have some good points - but one important point that is often missed in discussions like this is the fact that 90% of all MMO products should never be on the market and people deserve to know this.

I definitely agree that products should not be bashed just for the sake of selling your own. And I agree that there are too many people doing that.

But when that is said I think an even bigger problem online is the extreme number of fake positive reviews that people create just to make a sale.

The same people that complain when a WA member makes a negative review often have an army of affiliates creating fake positive reviews saying a product is amazing when in reality it is worthless.

These people will often become very upset with a negative review because it calls their BS and potentially ruins their business that is created on selling BS to newbies that do not know how to spot it. And sense WA members are very good at ranking they become extra upset.

I definitely agree that your points are important and we should always aim to be honest and not put down other products just for the sake of putting them down.

I just think that this kind of discussion often overlook the fact that positive fake review and BS products is an even bigger problem and is the reason many people waste hundreds or even thousands of dollars online before eventually giving up and thinking that making money online is not possible unless you want to sell BS - I almost gave up like that myself before finding WA.

I understand what you're saying and I agree that many of the products should never have been on the market, but help me understand are you suggesting that just because the products are horrible, we can't communicate with consideration? Don't you think it's possible to be honest, steer people clear, and speak with tact?

I agree that it should be done in a proper tone. I always try to make my reviews in a respectful tone.

But it depends what you mean with consideration - because it might be considered to the product creator to not call their BS but that consideration might end up costing many people hundreds of dollars if nobody is telling them what really to expect.

But completely agree that things can be said in many ways and personally I, for example, do not call anything a scam unless it has been legally labeled as a scam. However, if I see BS and promises I know are not true I will make people aware so they know what really to expect and how internet marketing really works.

We're on the same page. I'm not saying consideration in terms of tolerance or overlooking wrong. I call a "scam" a "scam" and I think people should know when a product is low quality, but it's how we say it that I'm shining light on here.

I think we should say that in the most tactful way we can muster. It's possible our tact can cause the customer and the product creator to self-discover (rather than us controlling the discovery thru our tone) and pivot.

Hear hear. I was one of those people paying more than $20,000+ before settling on WA. Thankfully I had the disposable income to not be affected by it but it’s important to recognize that some people who buy into one of those hyped up, useless MMO products are desperate and could be on their last legs financially.. I shudder to think what comes after they discover that they lost their investment due to slick ad copy with no real substance to support the hype.

Now that I drank the WA Kool-Aid and built some muscle, I’m using the things I learned here to help steer people away from 90% of the MMO garbage that’s currently out there. WA is very reasonably priced compared to the ridiculously marked up nonsense being peddled by certain people who will remain nameless for obvious reasons.

That being said, I know that it’s not our job to save the world but steering people away from the majority of the junk peddlers and redirecting them toward a platform we have all profited from is a great thing and we should all take pride in that.

I’m grateful I found WA and can leverage my poor experiences with other platforms out there to transform sour grapes into fine wine with nothing more than honesty.

I completely agree:-)

Great to hear you have learned steer away from the hyped scam products Kyle. And you are right that we might not be able to save the world by exposing the scams but it can save a few people that otherwise might have lost their last hard earned money.

I agree! "Sour Grapes". Haha.

Indeed. In my defense though, these were very thoroughly vetted training platforms, endorsed by people I once respected. I learned my lesson the hard way and sometimes we never learn until it hurts 🤣 it was the time wasted, not the money spent that hurt the most. Time is our most valuable currency, once you spend it, you can’t get it back, if I can spare as many people from that, I’ve done my job and I can rest easy with no regrets.

I think sometimes we need to read between the lines as others do also. Things can so easily be taken out of context. I try to be nice and would say that mostly I am but have many times been misunderstood. Get post by the way!

I'm no different. This is a reminder to me just as much as it is for anyone else.

I have found too often on Facebook what is thought or said does not translate well to print, and I’ll feelings can result.

That's something I'll have to pay closer attention to. Do you have an example?

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