You miss 100% of the shots you never take!

bySaraPoyner

1.7K followers

Updated 5 years ago

I have been very guilty in my past of turning so many opportunities down, sometimes even just at the thinking stage. My mind has got so used to me thinking things are not possible, that I have to make sacrifices, or even that being unhappy or stressed are noble and necessary.

I kept myself in a safe square box, where nothing and no one could hurt me. I did everything I could to avoid failing by not even trying. I built a place where no one could judge me. I observed life, and other peoples lives, sitting scrolling through Facebook with a feeling of envy at the friend who was going on their third holiday this year.

But then that little thing called a soul starts whispering, you deserve more, you can do more, and be more. You deserve to be happy and successful. The ironic thing is most of the time we ignore this wonderful little voice and listen to the negative one that keeps us scared and small.

I did an exercise recently, where I wrote down the times I was truly happy, truly fulfilled. Four periods of my life came up.

The first was when I quit my job as an Independent Financial adviser and went to work for a year as an entertainer in Majorca. (Everyone around me thought I was crazy). The second was when I just got in my car on a whim and drove to Scotland to climb a mountain. (everyone around me thought I was crazy). The third was just after I had my daughter, I lost all my pregnancy weight, and started a self-employed job running a wellness class (everyone thought I was crazy). The fourth was when I quit my job as a financial adviser to go study and get my degree in Theatre Arts (everyone thought I was crazy)

The common theme, was adventure, risk, having no boss, learning, theatre, dancing, singing, sunshine and mountains, oh and every time people thought I was crazy!

I have spent about 32 years of my life being scared, playing it safe and conforming to what i thought should do. Where did that get me? living with regrets, what ifs and a good dose of depression and anxiety. I have also spent 7 years of childhood (before the world got it's programming claws into me), and 5 years living true to my soul, with joy, purpose and fulfillment.

Reframe your what If's, kick your but's in the butt, and turn your Can't into how can I's

Why did I stay in a job that made me depressed or anxious for over ten years? because I made excuses to keep me safe. I have spent my life using What If's, But's and can't as shields and excuses. Sometimes the known is safe isn't it? Even if that known is completely unsatisfying.

In the past, I have been guilty of saying things like, 'I would love to be my own boss but I can't because', 'What if It fails', 'What if I'm not good enough', 'but I don't have any money', 'but I don't have the time'. I did this so much so, that my mind automatically went to my what if, but and can't, even if there wasn't one and I actually could.

So a great trick is to actually stop and go behind those thoughts, write them down. With the What if's, re frame it to the opposite positive, and then write the result. Instead of 'what if it fails?', it becomes 'what if I succeed?' Now it becomes exciting.

Take you but's and kick them in the butt. 'I would love to do that but...' just stop at the 'I would love to do that'. Now we are getting honest.

Turn your can't into how can I? Turn, 'I can't go on holiday next year as I don't have the money' to 'How can I go on holiday next year, how can I make some extra money?'. Now we are solving instead of avoiding.

Have the courage to have everyone think you are crazy

If I had listened to every person who told me what i was thinking, or was going to do was crazy, I would have spent 100% of my life small and scared and depressed. You just end up multiplying your fears and judgments by their fears and judgments and just get a great answer of FEAR and JUDGEMENT.

Much of the time others are just envious that they don't have the courage to be crazy. The very same people who told me not to quit my job to go to University, came up to me after I graduated to tell me how wonderful and brave it was, and how they had always wanted to do this or that.

Here I am, with my website and my pursuit of freedom with affiliate marketing, and guess what?, everyone thinks I'm crazy! The minute I stepped out of the box, people started looking for 'real' jobs for me, started trying to guide me back into the box. A while ago, I would have believed I had to get back in there. That joy and purpose and fulfillment, were only allowed to be experienced for moments. But they are not, I now have the courage to desire and dare to have them all the time.

The freedom trail is scary. Following your true potential and purpose might fail. I can't change that, but, what if this is the other way you were seeking?, What if this is the path to financial freedom and living a life of purpose and joy?

You miss 100% of the shots you never take! so take a shot and have the courage to make people think you are crazy.

Much Love

Sara