How I Dealt With Having Cancer

It was a Thursday in October 2008; I went to the doctor for my yearly mammogram. I sat in the waiting room in the lovely hospital gowns that they give you to wear. A little old lady was a head of me. Her daughter had brought her to the appointment. The little old lady must have seen it on my face that I did not like being there. She said to me, “It’s not as bad as you think. It doesn’t even hurt.” I just smiled at her and said “oh, I know, I’ve done this before”. But what I was really thinking was, “whatever lady; that’s why I took three ibuprofen before I got here”.

The little old lady was called back as I sat there flipping through magazines. I could not concentrate on anything to read so I just looked at the pictures. Then I hear the nurse, “Ms Sheila, right this way!” The exam got underway. It was taking a little longer than normal. The nurse told me to have a seat and she would make sure that the images were good. She comes back in a few minutes later and said she needed to take two more pictures. I asked if something was wrong and she said that she just wanted to get another angle. When she was done she told me that the doctor would look at them and let me know if she saw anything abnormal.

On Friday, about mid-morning, I get a call from the Women’s Diagnostic Clinic saying that they saw something that they would like to take another look at. The nurse said that it was probably nothing but they wanted to do an ultrasound on Monday to make sure. The nurse asked me if I drank a lot of caffeine. I told her I drink sweet tea everyday because I don’t like coffee. She asked if I could try not to eat or drink anything that contained caffeine during the weekend because that could be what they are seeing.

Come Monday morning, the nurse conducted the ultrasound and I was asked to wait in the waiting room until the Pathologist could read the results. Several minutes later the doctor calls me into a room. She said it looked like a small fibro-fatty cyst and she did not think it was anything we should worry about but she wanted me to come back in six months for a follow-up.

It was a Friday night, March 6, 2009. I remember it as if it was just yesterday. I was not in a habit of doing a self breast exam but for some reason, something told me that I needed to do one. So, when I went to bed that night I listened to my intuition and that is when I found a lump the size of a half dollar. Here it is a Friday and my OBGYN does not open until Monday morning. I was worried and concerned all weekend.

First thing Monday morning I called my Gynecologist office and spoke with the nurse. She transferred me to scheduling to schedule an appointment. The scheduling clerk said that they were booked until the following week because it was spring break. Well, I was not waiting for a week. I had questions, I wanted answers and I wanted them as soon as possible. Therefore, I called my Family Practitioner. He got me in the very next day for an appointment.

I went to my doctor’s appointment on Tuesday. The physician ordered an ultrasound to be done. While waiting for the results, so many things ran through my head. It had only been five months since I had my mammogram and ultrasound done. I knew in my heart it was cancer. Was I going to die? I’m only 40 years old. I have too much to do. It can’t be my time. I have a long life ahead of me. The doctor comes back into the room and tells me it looks very suspicious and that he ordered a mammogram and it was scheduled for the next day.

On Wednesday, my mammogram appointment was at 10:15 a.m. I had to go to it all alone. My oldest daughter was busy and I didn’t want to bother any of my friends. When the mammogram was done the nurse told me that the doctor’s office would call me after they read the results. I drove home in a daze, not sure if it was denial or shock. Thoughts ran through my head, “Is this really happening to me? Maybe they will call and say it was a mistake and that everything looked good”.

It was a little after one o’clock and the phone rings. I looked at the caller id and took a deep breath. I answered the phone and it was the nurse from my doctor’s office. She said, “Ms. Sheila, the mass we saw does look like cancer. Would you like to go to a doctor in Beaumont or would you like to go to MD Anderson?” I said, “MD Anderson and I hear they are the best in the world. That’s where I want to go.” I hung up the phone and cried. At that moment, I made up my mind. This was not going to beat me! I talked to God and said “Okay God, this is in your hands. You tell me what I have to do next.” At that moment, I literally felt the arms of God wrap around me! It was not until later I realize that I could feel Jesus holding me throughout my journey.

As humans, it is hard for us to give all of our cares and worries to God and then leave him alone so he can do his work. We have to remember that everything happens for a reason. God will take care of each and every situation if you will let him but you must remember; it is in God’s time, not ours. Let go and let God!

One and a half weeks after the mass was found I had an appointment with the Undiagnosed Breast Clinic at MD Anderson. On March 20, 2009, the tests begin…blood work, chest x-rays, CT, bone scan, oh NO not again, another mammogram, ultrasound and now a core needle biopsy. The mammogram and ultrasound both reveal a highly suspicious mass measuring 2.9 cm. The ultrasound also revealed a small satellite lesion approximately 3 inches from the primary lesion. I was told at this time there were no signs of cancer in my lymph nodes. “Praise God, a little good news.”

The next visit was with my Oncologist and the surgeon; we discuss where we would go from here. We talked about chemotherapy and surgery. If my mass was under 2 cm, I could have gone straight into surgery and had it removed but due to the size, it was already in stage two, I had to go through chemo. The first thing I ask: “Am I going to lose my hair?” He said: “by the second or third week“. I said, “Okay, well I have a pool tournament in two weeks. I don’t want to start my chemo until after that.” I thought my sister was going to come unglued. She said, “You need to start it when the doctor says to.” I told her that I was not going to stop living my life. I did not know what side effects I would have from the chemo and I wanted to play in the pool tournament. The Oncologist agreed with me.

My Oncologist went over the type of chemo that I would be taking. For twelve weeks straight, once a week, I would take paclitaxel (taxel for short) and then I would take four rounds of FAC (also known as “the red devil”) every twenty-one days. They suggest that you cut your hair before you start chemo so that’s what I did. I cut it in stages. Before my first round of taxel, I cut my hair to my shoulders.

I talked to a couple of women that had breast cancer. Both of them told me that they got really sick with chemo. For once in my life, I realized what my father had been telling me: “Take one day at a time.” That’s what I did. I did not dwell on what might happen. I made sure I had a smile on my face and I did not give up hope or lose my faith in God. I praised him constantly!

When I went in for my first round of chemo my blood pressure was a little high and they said that was normal. After all, it’s the unknown. I didn’t know how I was going to feel during or after chemo. Was I going to be sick? The nurse informed me that they would give me anti-nausea medicine and steroids. Steroids, I thought I would be losing weight…wrong! For the past month I had been eating anything and everything I wanted. I gained ten pounds and now I would be gaining more! So far so good, the first round of taxel went well. I didn’t feel any different except for having a little more energy. When I got home, I cleaned house a little bit and went to bed around eleven o’clock. By one thirty I was wide awake. I read some of a book and decide to get up and go to Wal-Mart before work. I did some shopping and still made it to work before six o’clock in the morning.

The week between my second and third round of taxel, my hair started falling out in the shower. That’s when I decided to cut it to a half inch all over my head. I bought some scarves and a hat that read “Hair By Chemo”. It was a real conversation piece. People I didn’t even know would come up to me and give me words of encouragement or they would just smile and say “I like the hat. You’re going to be just fine.”

Each week, about the second day after my chemo, I would feel tired but still managed to go to work. I worked full time except for a couple of days here and there I would be too tired to make it to work on time so I would just go in a little late. The twelve weeks of taxel went by pretty quick. Now it was time for the invasive chemo. My Oncologist said this one makes everyone sick. “Ok God, I need your help because I can’t afford not to work.” I knew I would have to take off of work for my surgery.

It was time to start thinking about surgery. So, for the next several weeks I prayed and asked God to help me make the right decision. When I talked to the surgeon I told him that he was the doctor and God was the healer. Therefore, whatever he needed to do to make sure I lived long enough to watch my grandchildren grow up!

During the night God woke me up at 1:00 AM and told me to send out an email. I laid in bed and tossed and turned not wanting to do it. Finally around 4:30 I got up and said, "Okay God, but you are going to have to tell me what to write." Below is the email that God put on my heart to write in July 2009.

God's work in progress...

As many of you know, last week was my first dose of the invasive chemo. The day after went well but come Thursday, when the steroids wore off, it was another story. I ached all over and felt nausea for three days. This week I am feeling much better. I want you guys to know what God has done (still doing)...The doctor told me that my cancer (mass) has shrunk almost in half! Praise God.

I didn’t ask for this disease, and I don’t know why I got it (not yet anyway). What I do know is that God allowed me to have it for some reason. One of the reasons, I believe, is so he can work through me. I don’t know if I’m supposed to pray for people or just be a witness. So I’ve been doing both. I’m not even sure why I’m sending this to all of you. I just know that God has put it on my heart to do so. Maybe something I say will touch one or more of you and I pray it does. I know I have strong faith in God and I have been told by people I see every day that they can see my faith. Maybe, since I don’t see all of you very often, I’m suppose to tell you that I will be fine and that I feel the presence of God throughout my body and around me every minute of every day. I feel people praying for me and I want to thank all of you for that! I don’t know what else he wants me to tell you but that your prayers are working. God Bless each and every one of you!

Love, Sheila

Notes from the doctor: “The patient has received 12 weekly doses of paclitaxel and 3 cycles of FAC. She is tolerating chemotherapy very well, and continues to work full time. Today, she presents to discuss further management. She offers no complaints”.

The doctor spoke too soon. It was the third round of the FAC; my husband was driving us home. Normally, I would go to sleep on the way home because it’s about a two hour drive. This week I was not tired. We got two blocks from the house and I made him pull over so I could bless the side of the road. That was the first and only time I got sick. I would get nauseas at times but not sick.

My last round of chemo was on September 1, 2009. I wondered if I would get sick again but I did not dwell on it. I breezed right through it. Thank the good Lord! At this point, I was told that the hard part was over. “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me”!

My surgery was scheduled for seven o’clock in the morning on October 19, 2009. We arrived Sunday night, at the Rotary House Hotel. I ate a big supper because I was told my surgery could last, anywhere, from six to eight hours. With my appetite…I knew I had better eat a good supper.

First thing in the morning, I kissed the kids and told them I loved them as I heading down for surgery. I had to check in at five o’clock and my children are not morning people so I let them sleep in. Surgery lasted about six in half hours. When I woke up from recovery, I found my Dad, my two brothers, my sister, their spouses, a couple aunts, a uncle, some cousins, even my preacher and his wife, all there to support me and my family.

After surgery it seems like they want you out of the hospital as soon as possible. Don’t leave until you are ready! I stayed for two days after surgery. I did not want to drive two hours to find out that something was not right.

All was going well until about the third week, I started running fever. I was hurting so bad that I couldn’t even lie down in my bed. I had to sleep propped up on the couch or in the recliner. It was a Friday night so I had my husband drive me to the local emergency room. They ran tests: blood work, X-rays, CT scan and could not find anything wrong. I was given antibiotics through an IV and sent home with some to take by mouth for seven to ten days.

Exactly two weeks to the day, Friday night, I started running fever again. This time I had my husband drive me to the MD Anderson emergency room. While waiting in the hallway for eighteen hours, the doctor ordered an ultrasound. Again, nothing! I told them that I knew my body and something was not right. Why couldn’t they find out what it was? Why was I hurting and running fever if there was nothing wrong? The doctor told me that I had major surgery and it would take time to heal. I was giving another round of antibiotics through an IV and sent home with seven to ten days of oral antibiotics.

It was Tuesday, December 8, 2009, a little over two weeks from the last episode. This time I woke up to find redness so I took a picture. I was going to have proof. We drove to MD Anderson to see the Reconstructive Surgeon. Right away he admitted me into the hospital. Hooked me up to an IV and pumped more antibiotics into my system. He said if it was not better in two days I would have to go back to surgery.

Two days later, on my daughters twenty-first birthday, I was back in surgery. As soon as I woke up from the anesthesia and I mean as soon as I woke up, I felt 100% better. The doctor came to talk to me and told me that I was not crying wolf. He said I had a real bad infection. The doctor did what he had to do to take care of the issue. Now, I was on my way to a full recovery!

At first I was told I would not have to go through radiation. Shortly after surgery the surgeon felt that he got all the cancer but would like me to go through radiation just as a precaution. I was really dreading this. I did not want to go through radiation.

Due to being set back from the infection, it took three tries before the Radiology Team could get my mold set. It was the end of December and I was told that I would have six weeks of radiation, five times a week. I was not looking forward to that at all! It was not like tanning in a tanning bed.

The first three weeks went pretty smooth. When they tell you not to wash the area with soap, listen to them! I felt like I had body odor, so I would wash under my arm. Well, approaching week four my skin under my arm started to peel! It was not a pretty site and it hurt like you would not believe. My shirt would rub on it so I could not put my arm down by my side. The Radiology Team gave me something to put on it that helped. I also had to clean it with a mixer of peroxide and water to help it heal. It made for a long two more weeks!

Then the day finally came when I could ring the bell…

The plaque reads…

Ring this bell, three times well, Its toll to clearly say…

My treatment’s done, the course has run and I am on my way!!!

I hope you enjoyed my story but most of all, I hope you got something out of it! I firmly believe that it was my faith in God and stubbornness that helped me through it. Remember to have faith, laugh often and love much! Life is short…count your blessings. I have been blessed in so many ways!