Have you ever grew up with fear?
You know, I come from a generation where people were being turned onto different ways to make money; I was born in 1980. Ever since I was a kid, I always “knew” that I was different or thought different from other kids and other people for that matter. I was always good at thinking ahead especially into the future, it was always enough for me to keep my mind open and exposed to many things including working for myself.
By the time I was in college, I had two jobs and I didn’t last long on either of them; one I quit because I hated the hours and the other one I got let go from because my heart wasn’t in it.
My mother grew up in the 1960s in fact she was born in 1960, my mother’s parents were very narrow-minded people (may they rest in peace). They have spat on many a dream that my mother had including wanting to go into the Navy. My mother had many dreams but grew up and ended up marrying my dad (may he rest in peace), having his children and her dreams unfulfilled.
My mother in turn grew up to have a bit of a close mind herself which in turn she has tried to transfer to her children. You’re probably wondering why I’m bringing this up, I bring this up for the sole purpose of making the point that you can have all of the dreams in the world and if you don’t have someone whose supportive of those dreams, you can feel and most likely, give up on those dreams.
I just started my new businesses only lifestyle where I’m focusing on my businesses instead of working a 9-5 job, and I’m feeling pretty confident about it but I had a little bit of fear creep in while I was out driving earlier doubting me that I’ll make the kind of money on my own that’s needed to survive without a 9-5.
In a big way, I blame my mother for this because even when I was working for myself before back in 2012, she wasn’t very supportive of it then because she always believed and still does today that working a 9-5 will always imply job security or you’re only as successful as your 9-5.
This has made it hard for me to solely focus on my goals because I’m always worried about the slightest thing going wrong, I’m breaking that now slowly but surely! My advice to all of you, if you grew up around fear especially if you got the mindset from a parent, don’t let it take you over! That’s one of the biggest mistakes you can ever make, block that mindset out and be vigilant in your goals. You want a vision of the ugliest thing on Earth, that’s doubt, pure and simple!
Doubt is so ugly that it can make the ugliest person you’ve ever gone out with look like a beauty pageant contestant! Don’t let doubt rule or entertain you, rise above it!
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It's hard to escape that fear when you experience it every day. I am glad your life is changing, Rodney, and I hope your dreams find you.
Thanks Granny Fran, I live everyday knowing that things won't change unless I change them but you know there's always a monkey throwing a wrench into things sometimes but even then you have to find a way to make it work because, giving up especially what I sacrificed, is not an option.
Wow Rodney, what a great post and right from your heart.
I so can relate to you as my mum was very protective to a point of where, I feel I missed out on a lot of experiences. Bless her heart, she was the fearful one. Afraid of the consequences that her children's actions would get them into trouble.
Born in a country called Ceylon which is now Sri Lanka, when we came to Canada, it was a different world.
The fear my mum had became stronger, and it did trickle down to me.
Yes, I did miss out on a lot, but I wonder if that fear was not there, and the strict measures were not enforced where would I be now.
Doubt, does come in the way of progress and new experiences. I have followed you Rodney, read your posts even had the opportunity to visit your page. In my eyes you have done extremely well for yourself, and I am proud to be a part of your network.
I wish you continuing success and all the very best,
Michael
Thanks Mike, I appreciate you being in my network and it makes me extremely proud that I'm not alone in this. You know, the hardest thing about a new anything is the implementation but there's always a chance something can go wrong but I think as long as you have an exit strategy or even a strategy in general you can land on your feet; - you'll still take some damage but it won't hurt as much - (Video game lingo).
Rodney, make your entrance strategy count, I know you can and forget about any having any exit strategies. The worst hurt can come when you don't try. I consider you a rising star.
All the best,
Michael
Thanks brother, that means a lot. And you know, I'm just getting ready to sign off on the dotted line with another project I'm finalizing so I'm working toward getting out to the public. I feel successful having done that.
I grew up different because I am Deaf. My whole family is Deaf. We lived through the 60’s’ 70’s and 80’s having our home vandalized by pundits who thought we were dummies. We were white middle class family and my Dad worked for the federal government US postal services and my Mom was a school teacher. We were an educated family and not no dummies.
My late Dad who was Deaf, stood his ground. He had enough. He bought a German Shepherd and had the dog trained by a K-9 police officer and trainer. The reason was to guard our home from these pundits. And to protect his home and kept his wife and children safe.
My siblings and I were safe after getting Zena. Zena was a blessing for our family. The vandalism stopped. But other problems popped up. Neighbors started to bully us and the dog attacked them one got seriously injured. Good for him after that he never touched foot in our yard. We grew up in burbs town near Minneapolis and St. Paul, Minnesota.
Their parents tried to sue my parents in court. My parents won the case because the court agreed that my Dad had a right to protect his property and his children after all the kids bullied us in our yard.
They came to our yard to torture us. Zena knew and did what she was trained for. The court awarded a certain sum that the other parents had to pay because their children could not learn to leave us alone and respect our right to be in the neighborhood.
I had a fear of living in a house so swore to myself never be a home owner. I always lived in an apartment that was secured locked and had a special way to gain entry. We suffered so many years of vandalism that it wasn't worth living in a house.
My parents had to pay for a lot of damages that was done by these no good humans. Years later, guess what happened? Those bullies ended up having Karma come to them. One of that got bit them had a deaf child, another had a Downs Syndrome child, the other end up dead due to being trouble maker and ended up in prison died there. Many bad things happened to those bullies.
Today, we see still see bullying happen in schools and neighborhoods. We have better laws now but I feel bad for some kids who died by suicide due to bullying.
That is an ongoing problem not only that but now shootings happening all over the place.
We feel that our lives were spared due to Zena. She was a great dog until she died a natural death due to old age.
Fears can really rule your life. As far as business goes don't let doubt take over as that makes things worse and it wont help you to prosper. Your mindset needs to be set in the right direction.
Wow Bren-Bren, I never knew; well, I'm glad that you and your family were able to survive such abuse. Man, what is wrong with people, bullying deaf people, that's so immoral. That would've pissed me all the way off!
Karma is a bitch because all of those jerks got what they deserved, I'm glad that happened to them; picking on someone with a disability like that, what the hell is wrong with them.
I'm through letting my fear rule my life especially since I feel like it was "awarded" to me from my mother, I don't want to raise my child thinking its okay to not take a risk because you could end up destroyed in some way because of it. Life is about peace of mind including whatever peace of mind you can get from doing your own thing and making money.
I hear you loud and clear.
I have had very similar experience, although I am sure she meant it in a good way.
But I learn that nothing of that above matters. We can make our own conscious decision.
It is sometimes difficult and it won't happen over the night.
Anyways, it helps me that I am not alone :)
Cheers
Mike
Indeed you aren't Mike; it kind of sucks that people don't support your dream or think its unrealistic but I'm determined to go through with my lifestyle and be a success.
I too knew at a very young age that i was different, while my friends were into video games and watching tv i was on the internet (yahoo and Google) searching and learning all i could about anything that interested me. I always had this sense about me that i was going to be super successful in life one day but also i have a sense that I'm not meant for this world, I don't mean not meant to live I mean not meant to be a slave to bills and work a 9 - 5 to pay said bills and be caught up in that cycle. I have always had the entrepreneurial spirit. I'm an Alpha male a born leader and i know all it takes is the dream to know that things can change and the desire and confidence to make that change! Now that doesnt mean I'm going to be successful at the first thing i do. No No No in fact i have had many business that have failed but the thing that seperates a true entrepreneur from someone else is they dont let that failure destroy them they learn from that failure get back up and keep on pushing. It is very nice to have someone support your dreams but honestly if you really want to be successful you have to support your own dreams and believe they will happen regardless what anyone else says or thinks. Hope this helps a little!
First off, you're like me in the aspect of 'not meant to be in this world'. I always felt like that ever since I was a kid, I'm all about being successful and believing in my own dreams. However, I want it to go on the record that growing up in a household full of people who you were clearly beyond then it can make you feel like a loner to that regard but I am definitely ready to make my dreams come true. Thanks for your interest tidbit of advice friend.
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I understand completely where you are coming from, Rodney, but as you mentioned early in your post, you always knew that you were different from others....always thinking forward. Keep focused on this Rodney even though the path may seem difficult at times. All the best.
Wayne
Thanks W, always good to see you chime in; I hope you've been well my friend.
Thanks, Rodney.
Wayne