What's wrong with me?
JUST CAN'T FIGURE THINGS OUT
"What is wrong with me?" "Why am I like this?" We've all asked ourselves this question at one time or another. Behind this perplexing question lies the root question: Is it possible for someone with my background, my education, my personality, my family history, my age and my skills to obtain success? The answer to this question is a definite "YES!"
If you are willing to change your mind and cultivate a new MENTAL OUTLOOK, you can overcome your fears, inhibitions, low self-esteem and all other roadblocks to success. The way you think about yourself and your condition affects all decisions you make. To change your mind is to change your life. To learn how to think is to learn how to live.
At the core of our uncertainty and low self-esteem are our mental blocks, confusions, misconceptions, prejudices and insecurities. Therein lies our problem, but here is the good news: You can change your outlook on life! You can develop healthy, self-esteem, trust, joy and confidence.
You can change your outlook because you are its creator. It's Your Mind! By choosing your thoughts wisely, your outlook can change and your life can be new, exciting and rewarding.
By learning to love yourself unconditionally, you can learn to love others and love life! To gain control over your mind is to gain control of your life. If this post does nothing more than motivate you to consciously chose your thoughts and reactions, it will have had a positive, life-changing effect on you.
FEAR: MENTAL ENEMY NO.1
Although human problems come in all sizes, shapes, colors and categories, at the bottom line of most of our problems is that ugly four-letter word: FEAR.
Fear is the mind's worst enemy and it raises extreme havoc when we allow it to enter and dominate our thoughts. Once allowed to enter, fear will always fight for control and total mental domination. That is the nature of this insidious enemy.
While fear can come to us in any of hundreds of different forms, there appear to be eight major fears that humans allow themselves to suffer most from. Please don't become uneasy if you recognize several of your pet fears here.
Almost everyone suffers from a combination of these demonic little jewels from time to time. The key factor lies in degrees.
THE EIGHT MAJOR FEARS:
- the fear of going crazy
- the fear of failure
- the fear of sickness
- the fear of poverty
- the fear of not being loved
- the fear of loss of love
- the fear of old age
- the fear of death
All other fears are insignificant compared to these eight and can be categorized within the above eight headings. Now, let's take a penetrating look at these fearful gobins and shine some light on them.
THE FEAR OF GOING CRAZY
The fear of being crazy or going there is one of the most prevalent fears people have, yet is seldom talked about. While it could be said with some justification that most of us are a little crazy or neurotic, at least some of the time, only a small percent of the population is medically and/or legally judged to be mentally ill, psychotic or insane.
Most fear is 100% negative; howeer, some degree of PROTECTIVE FEAR (awareness is a better word) can be positive in protecting us against accidents, pitfalls, etc; and this also applies to the fear ofgoing crazy or of being crazy.
First of all, no one fearful of going crazy is crazy. The seriously mentally ill seldom see themselves in their true condition. Fear of craziness is not craziness itself.
THE FEAR OF FAILURE
The fear of failure and the fear of criticism are closely related. This fear is a major stumbling stone in the path toward sucess and self-actualization.
Isn't it incredible that our fear of lack of success can actually rob us of the opportunity to be successful? Yet, this is a fact. The time, Although thousands of positve thinking, self-help and metaphysical books have been written and read by millions, the majority of people continue their love affair with failure.
The same thrust of personal energy needed to bring success is required to fail. It takes energy to fail. Failure is misspent energy poured into the wrong bottomless pit. This appears to be a paradox, but it isn't. It is absolute truth, although difficult to understand at first.
THE FEAR OF POVERTY
Your mind is capable of bringing you weailth or poverty. Fear of poverty and poverty itself are the result of impoverished mental attitudes. The fear of poverty can be just as destructive as the state of poverty, for if left unchecked, it can reduce one to poverty or keep one in that state of lack and limitation - a never-ceasing struggle just to make sure ends meet - which is a sorry state of existence.
Associated with poverty is suffering, humility and a feeling of despair. Only those who have experienced poverty understand the full meaning of the conditions. However, most of us have experienced a degree of poverty, even if we have never been bankrupt or flat broke. The fear of poverty is another matter.
While it may not render us busted or completely broken, it certainly can prevent us from reaching success. This fear brings self-doubt, distorts reason, destroys creative imagination, robs us of our self-reliance, dulls enthusiasm and replaces desire with despair.
If allowed to grow and fester, it can kill our initiative and success - drive, and leave us in a mire of uncertainty, doubt, procrastination and a feeling of powerless.
The Seven Symptoms of Poverty Fear:
- low self - esteem
- lack of moivation
- lack of faith
Low self - esteem. At the head of this list is low self-esteem, and frankly, all other symptoms could be summed up under this impoverished conditions. Low self-esteem means little or no self-love.
When we are not expressing healthy, vibrant self-love, it is impossible to love and respect others or to love life itself. While no one is attractive very long to a person expressing egocentric self-love, people in harmony with themselves in spirit, mind and body are always radiating positive self-love. These are the people we love being near!
Lack of motivation is prevalent where ambition is missing. People who embrace mental and physical laziness may not sink to the depths of poverty, although they could. Often they are able to "just get by," viewing their life and their jobs as a never-ending struggle, which in fact is exactly what they have become.
Indecision is particularly dangerous. When you refuse to take a stand and make decisions, someone else usually will come along to make your decisions for you. This result is usually anything but self-satisfying.
Doubt is very closely related to low self-esteem. It often invades the consciousness of those who have tried once or twice missed the mark. Instead of jumping back in the race, as a winner must, they become fearful of taking a new risk and often criticize those who do.
Worry is common among those who are mistake-prone. Some people program their minds for success; others program failure. The failure-types are stuck in a rut, victims of their own endless treadmill. If this condition is not eradicated, these folks often slip into depression, frown constantly and neglet personal appearances.
Excessive drinking, compulsive overeating and even the use of narcotics are a danger if the person consumed with worry also has a compulsive nature.
Lack of faith breeds negativity. The winners in life are all believers. Those lacking in faith are beaten before they begin. Nothing great was ever accomplished by over-cautious types who had no faith. Anyone can find the negative side in every situation. "America would never had been discovered if someone with faith had not taken a chance."
Procrastination stops success cold! It is an absolute destructive state of mind and being. The procrastinator may think he or she is conserving energy, but actually they are spending it in large degress without reaping any of its benefits. This symptom is a cousin of lack of faith. The procrastinator shirks resposibility due to self-doubt.
So in summing up, 'the fear of poverty' is the chief villian that interferes with thoughts of abundance and the "can do" attitude. Think positively and act abundantly and watch the fear of poverty flee!
THE FEAR OF NOT BEING LOVED
The fear of not being loved is another common, yet insidious, state of mind, It is closely related to our need for approval, but it is an even stronger concern. Untold miseries are wrought by those who believe they are unloved.
We can say, without qualification, "love approval" pre-occupies a great many of our waking hours and can be our foremost concern. We reallycan't allow ourselves to fear being unloved. Not if happiness is our goal.
THE FEAR OF LOSS OF LOVE
The fear of losing love is based on feelings that we are going to have love taken away from us. We may sense a lover will desert us, a spouse will divorce us, our children will soon leave home. friends will move away or in some way abandon us.
This fear stems from a belief that we are going to become losers. Something of precious value may be leaving us. Our first fearful thought usually is: clutch and hold on!
THE FEAR OF OLD AGE
While many fears can be said to be totally unfounded in regard to reality, the fear of old age can be laid to the fact that we all are getting older. An 11 year old girl recently lamented on her age: "I used to love to play with my dolls, but that was before I got so old."
The fact that we are getting older can lead to negative thoughts such as: I can't have fun any more; I can't do some of the things I used to like doing; my looks are diminishing and/or my personal value is decreasing. Let's look at fear up close.
Here are seven basic reasons why many people (perhaps most of us) fear aging:
- Increased susceptibility to injury and ailments
- Loss of beauty (youthful appearance, etc,)
- Erosion of physical strength
- Pronounced prejudices many people have against older people
- The need to depend more on others
- The loss of some people we love
- The approach of death
No one is immune to sickness, injury or nagging ailments because of his or her age. While it is true that a young man or woman of 21 is less likely to be injured in strenous activities than an older person of 71, the senior citizen should know far more about his or her tolerance level, body needs and physical limitations.
THE FEAR OF DEATH
The fear of death is very strong NO Matter WHAT your age bracket is. While death, like taxes, may be inevitable, thoughts of life and love can actually keep us fit, alive and happy much longer.
For those who believe in 'Life After Death,' is cheated of any final victory. Think about joy, and love and life will take on a dramatic new meaning. The fear of death, like all other kinds of fears is actually what can keep us from free expression and productive living.
In response to this blog's title; "What's wrong with you? Not a single thing that some New Thoughts will not correct!"