Communicating With Alzheimer And Dementia Sufferers

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5.3K followers

My Wife shared this on Facebook this morning.

Like cancer, pretty much all of us will know someone who suffers
or who has suffered with Alzheimers or Dementia.

I bet most, if not all, of us thought at some point 'I hope they pull they plug
if that ever happens to me.' I know I certainly did.

We can make the lives of sufferers so much more bareable, and in so
doing make it so much easier for ourselves to cope as family members
and / or carers, simply by thinking how we can best communicate with the
sufferer.

  • Never reason - instead, divert
  • Never shame - instead, distract
  • Never lecture - instead, reassure
  • Never say 'Remember' - instead, reminisce
  • Never say 'I told you' - instead, repeat and re-group
  • Never say 'You can't' - instead, find out what they CAN do
  • Never command or demand - instead, ask and model
  • Never condescend - instead, encourage and praise
  • Never force - instead, re-inforce

It's not dis-similar to the way we communicate with our children when they
are little and we all know that how we do that will shape their lives and the
people they become.

Hopefully, one day a cure will be found and will be freely available to all.



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Recent Comments

70

P.S. As I attended the Alzheimer Summit some time ago I downloaded a very good book. If you contact me I can forward this PDF to you.
taetskeguillaume@gmail.com

Thanks - my e-mail is whoisrichardbrennan@gmail.com
Look forward to hearing from you :-)

Good evening Rich,

There are various things one can try. A change of food can do a lot and I think the following is worth trying. An old lady, well over 80, did not recognize her husband anymore. She was given 6 soup spoons of coconut oil, virgin, of course, a day. This oil is food for the brain and after some month she regained part of her memory. Our so- called modern life does not promote health, we are bombarded every day with toxins and the food is not food anymore.I wish you all the best.

Regards, Taetske

Thanks for sharing. Hope it too :)

You're welcome :-)

Yes, and be immensely patient with people who suffer from Alzheimer disease, and do not always tell the truth. Do not let their parents die every time they talk about them, it hurts them the same every time again

So true, Loes. Just because they can't communicate quite so well it doesn't neccessarily mean they don't understand some of what is going on around them and what people say.

Absolutely, Loes. Patience and empathy are key :-)

I know Richard, my Dad died 3 years ago after a debilitating suffering of 10 years from this dreadful disease. The last 7 months he couldn't stay at home and was placed into a care. He died in a total misery, anguish and delirium of knowing nothing.

You know, I never cried when he passed away, but I still cry when I think of his last months before he died.

I can't describe the pain it causes, how my Dad slipped away like that, in total unknowingness.

So sorry to hear about your Dad, Loes. I can certainly equate with what you say about your grieving. The sufferer's passing can only be a release for them from their misery but for those left behind witnessing their ordeal can be far worse than witnessing their eventual end.

Thank you, yes, so true

Thank you for sharing. I lost my mum to dementia - such wisdom in those words.

So sorry to hear about your Mum, Debbie. My Wife lost her Nan to dementia a few years back. It's terrible watching a person literally deterioriate mentally, just as it is to see them go down hill physically with something like cancer.

Thanks for sharing Richard:). Wise words!!

You're welcome, thanks :-)

Very good article. Thank you! My dad had dementia and did what what you said.He was 88 years old.

Your Dad still lived to a ripe old age - good on him :-)

Morning (South Africa) Rich. Here is a YouTube video that helped me a lot and can help other people as well. The link is: CrZXz10FcVM

A great post and should fit well into a medical niche site!

Thanks, Mike - hopefully it'll give someone a bit of inspiration for their posts and some hope to the people who read them :-)

I am also doing my Journey of Alzheimer or which we have done quite well with my mother. Hopeforalzheimer.com Liked your article

There's some great info on your site, Marjorie and some real inspiration there too. I tried to comment but could not find the comments section.
Rich

I am still working on it. Will have a place for you to comment in about week. Moving as I go through the lessons. Thanks so much for your comment. Hoping this will help others

Private Message me as a reminder when you've got the page ready, Marjorie. My site should be ready to comment on by then so if you'd kindly return the favour I'd really appreciate it :-)
Cheers
Rich

I will. But how do I Private message you. Very new

Just to the left of a person's Profile Picture is a blue box saying 'Private Message'. Just select that and it will open up a PM to the person who's profile page you are on :-)

This is one of my blogs on Alzheimer, I think it could be helpful..http://coconutoilwellnesses.com/coconut-oil-for-alzheimers-disease.. Thank you for sharing..

Pat

Great blog, Pat - I've left a comment on there for you.
Rich

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