Believing In Yourself (and ignoring the haters).

byRachelDay

117 followers

Updated 4 years ago

Thomas Edison (for the younger crew, he’s the guy who invented the light bulb, the phonograph and the motion picture camera) once said,“Discontent is the first necessity of progress.” In a nutshell, what he meant was that it is perfectly normal (and even a good sign) if you are currently feeling a bit ‘meh’ about your life. That’s the inner you, your soul, that is urging you to break free of comfort zones, self-sabotage, limitations, toxic environments and even certain people to make your dreams come true. Everyone has very different goals. And success is how you define it. But if you know deep down that you are not fully satisfied with your life and you are just going round and round in circles (I call it ‘the carousel of nonsense), then it is time for a shake up. Without a shake up, there is no change. You see, in order to have what you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done. It’s always scary getting out of your comfort zone and some attempts will not go as planned, but others lead to rewards! That’s just the game of life I’m afraid. And it happens to the best of them! Did you know that Walt Disney was turned down around 300 times before he finally secured the financing for his dream project Walt Disney World! And J.K Rowling’s first manuscript for Harry Potter was rejected by 12 publishing houses! Pretty sure they are kicking themselves now! Failures are not the end. They are just stepping stones taking you closer to success. Success happens to some of us at different stages of our lives.. So don’t think to yourself ‘oh well, I’m not 21 any more so there’s no point in trying to make it in singing, acting, producing…’Or whatever your dream is! Here are just some beloved stars who made it later, when the time was right for them.

Jane Lynch landed a role in Christopher Guest’s ‘Best In Show’ at the age of 40! Following supporting roles in ‘The L Word’ and ‘The 40 Year Old Virgin,’ she was finally cast in the gig that actually made her famous! As Sue Sylvester in ‘Glee’ at the age of 49.
Alan Rickman. The late, great Rickman known most famously for his roles as the Sheriff of Nottingham in ‘Robin Hood Prince of Thieves’ and of course, Professor Snape in the Harry Potter film series didn’t get his big break until he was cast as the bad guy in Die Hard at the age of 42.
Vera Wang. After starting out as a figure skater and turning to journalism for a short time, the famous designer opened her first bridal boutique at the age of 40!
Samuel L. Jackson didn’t become one of the highest-grossing actors of all time until the age of 46 in Pulp Fiction.
Morgan Freeman. I don’t know about you, but I can’t imagine a time where Morgan Freeman was not famous! Believe it or not, Freeman started out in the Air Force as a fighter pilot. He then moved into acting much later, struggled for a while before making the big time at aged 50!

And some special mentions should go to…

Susan Boyle. At the age of 48, fairly shy and retiring and a carer for her mother, Boyle was the most unlikely star. But the universe works in wonderful ways and it was time for Susan to shine! Her international fame came as a contestant on ‘Britain’s Got Talent,’ she then released a number 1 bestselling album in 2009 and the rest is history.
Sia has an amazing story to tell. Born in Adelaide Australia, Sia struggled for years trying to make it as an artist. It just seemed that her career was going nowhere and she was fighting a losing battle. Her boyfriend tragically died in a car accident in London and she spiralled into depression, relying on alcohol, Oxycontin and Xanax to get her through the day. She couldn’t get on stage without the aid of alcohol and she continued on her mediocre path, contemplating suacide, depressed and broken. But somehow, she kept going and started to write hit songs for other singers such as Beyonce, Rihanna and Kelly Clarkson. Sia finally made it at the age of 38 through determination and learning to love herself. She is now worth around $20 million.
Ricky Gervais originally had dreams of becoming a singer in the 1980’s, but went on to become a comedian, actor, writer, producer and director. Not bad really when you think he was going nowhere until the age of 40 when he co-created the highly successful mock documentary ‘The Office.’ He’s gone onto win seven BAFTA awards, five British Comedy Awards and in 2010 was named on the Time 100 list of the world’s most influential people. Now at aged 59 he is living in the lap of luxury, has made several TV shows and movies, brushing shoulders with the rich and famous, hosting the Golden Globe Awards and still has time to campaign for animal rights and keep his millions of social media followers entertained.

So it’s never too late to believe in your dreams! You will experience rejection, competition and even jealousy! Everyone who gains success in their field has experienced this. If you think that you are going to sail straight to the top without having encountered any negative Nancy’s or dealing with rejection then that is extremely naive. And let me tell you a secret…the more you believe in yourself and put yourself out there, the more you will attract individuals who want to bring you down. Now it’s how you react to these individuals that makes or breaks you. You will find these people all around you. Your work colleagues, your family, friends…Choose to rise above it and keep your eye on the target because if you bite, or rise up to the bait or believe what they are telling you, then your dreams and goals go straight out of the window – and that’s the end of that! If they cannot support you or be happy for you, limit your time with them because you deserve to be around people who empower and support you. People who think that it’s acceptable to belittle you, humiliate you, make you the butt of the joke, tell you what to do with your life, control you or just discredit anything you say or do is not worth your energy and time and you need to walk away for the sake of your own sanity and well being.

Ways To Believe In Yourself

Be kind to yourself – relax, do things that inspire you or make you happy. Try a new hobby or learn a new skill, go for a spa day or for a picnic in nature. Just think about what it is that makes you feel good and go do it 🙂
Challenge self-limiting thoughts – if you have any bad thoughts about yourself, any doubts or resistance, write them down and then write a counter thought next to it. For example, if you wrote ‘I’m not attractive enough,’ then write next to it ‘I am unique and I stand out for all the right reasons.’ Not everyone appreciates the perfect ‘Kardashian’ or Instagram model look. Many people like natural features or unusual features because it’s ‘different.’ And different = rare and unique.
Fall in love with yourself – not in a narcissistic way but in a healthy way. Check out my ‘Five Ways To Stand Out And Shine’ article for more on this. But as you get to know yourself on a deeper level and you love and respect yourself, you are emanating an energy that is so unmistakably attractive and charismatic that others (the ones who matter) will be drawn to you. Fall in love with you first before the rest of the world does. I have never seen a celebrity or influential person who did not possess some level of self-respect. And yes, they get haters too! When you rise up, the ones who feel inferior to you (that’s their own insecurities by the way, not your problem) will try and pull you back down to their level. Don’t do it!
Keep visual reminders of your goals and things that make you feel good – because this keeps you going on crappy or stressful days. You need inspiration every day! Create a vision board or a dream book and use images to ignite that fire inside you. No one of any consequence got anywhere in life by playing it safe all the time. Get out of your comfort zone and start taking steps towards your goals. Be a maverick, challenge other people’s ignorance or perceptions, break the mould, speak up and do not give a damn about what others think. This is your journey, not theirs.
Always keep going – there are times in life where you feel lost and like you have wandered off the path. But luckily for us, we have a built-in navigation system that is way better than any sat-nav! Your intuition. Listen to your inner voice and it will guide you. Be clear about who you are, what you want, where you are going and what your boundaries are. What behaviour will you not accept from others? They say that we become the five people we most hang around with. So maybe you need to re-think the company that you keep. Or maybe you are just your own worst enemy. But no matter what happens, no matter what anybody says – always stay true to yourself. And I’ll leave you with this incredible quote with another ‘late bloomer’ and influential person.