Depression is Depressing!

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I have had a terrible few days. If, I'm honest, it's more like a few weeks. It feels like I have a heavy heart, or someone is sitting on my chest. It's difficult to describe how I feel.

Everyone looks at me and thinks I have a good life, that I don't have any problems. In reality, I feel so much is expected of me, and that sometimes, I just don't know how I can possible deliver.

I don't like letting people down. I try to help everyone. No one seems to notice that I have problems too. Are you OK, Paul? I don't think people want to hear of my woes, so I just reply with a smile, I'm OK.

Everything I try this last week seems to just fall-apart. I have tried hard to fix my website but I'm not sure if I'm making things worse. I just hope when I have finished re-working all my posts, Google with start ranking my pages.

The Sun Will Rise

My words ranked, but now they've tanked!
On Bing I'm number one,
Yahoo too, not to be undone.
Google though, I've not banked.

Polish and scrub, the words shine.
Aitch two, aitch three, sub-heading,
I'm not sure where this is leading.
So sorry, I don't mean to whine!

My chest is heavy, my heart is sad.
Send me cheer, I can do this,
Positive thoughts, sheer bliss!
Tomorrow the sun will rise, that's not bad.

I'm going to meditate for thirty minutes, have a cup of tea, then I'm off to bed. I've not had a good day today. Goodnight!

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Recent Comments

69

Ah yes I know that feelng well. Being the one with a smile, doing your best, helping all you can when inside it is all such a struggle.

Focus always on the positives becusae we can only ever change the future. Talk to those you are close to because if they really care they will help.

And although you dont "really" know any of us on here just let us know if we can help, i certainly will if possible

Tomorrow will be a new day and I'm sure it will be a good one

Kevin

Thanks, Kevin. I talked to my wife. Jip is my rock!

Good stuff Paul, your lucky to have her.

Now off for good nights sleep! and just shout if we can help

Kevin

Hi Paul, I thank you for sharing your feelings. Sharing is the first task we need to do, it is only then that we can help ourselves and others in dealing with this un-foreseen disease of depression. I suffer from depression, anxiety, and self induced stress. Depression is nasty. The feeling of being homesick and not knowing where home is. So important to remember the six greatest doctors. Be well my friend for what I can not see I can only imagine. You are welcome to PM me. Bananas, avocado, herbal teas, dark chocolate even celery without the vodka of course. Do not keep your feelings inside. I am here, PM me anytime, and let us kick some depression butt out the window.
All the best,
Michael

Ah! Chocolate. Nothing wrong with a man who likes chocolate, my friend!

Paul, that is "Dark Chocolate". :)

We have days when it is a challenge but hang in there you will see the silver lining.

Thank you, Norman. Tomorrow is another day.

Hey Paul... I get it!
I wish I had more, but just know you are not alone!
Combatting the bad days are a win, so keep fighting!
Shaunna

Thank you, Shaunna. I’m happy someone understands.

Thoughts are with you my friend - we've all been there and go back too often.
Just think that you are a few more steps along the journey to your goal - sure go sit under that tree and take a break but tomorrow or the next day take the next few steps.
Lawrence

Thanks, Lawrence. When the bell rings in the morn, I’ll come back fighting!

God is a burdden bearer there is no need for worring.
Cheers.

Less worry, more frustration, Pastor.

Prayed for you.
Cheers!

These feelings came to pass. It happens to all of us. I have had lots of those days but I learned to stop focussing on what people need and what people think and celebrate the wonderful creation called 'ME'. Take yourself out on a date and list all the things you like about yourself. As I said...."It came to pass"

I will try that, Joy. 😊

Don't feel like the Lone Ranger. We all have those bad times. Hopefully after your tea and your sleep you felt a bit better.

It's hard to keep going when things seem to be heading down instead of up. I hope you come through things okay. Maybe you should take a whole day off and go do something completely different. Change sometimes helps jolt us out of a bad place. I do hope you find a solution soon.

Thank you, Fran.

Not many people understand Depression. It has been creeping upon me over time. It just came to a head today. The frustration of not being able to do something just tipped the balance.

So much has needled me this week. Half of my colleagues were made redundant. The company is fighting for survival, and I don’t know when I’ll be next for the chop. A part of me says I’d like it be soon!

Writing about my feelings and writing a poem helped. I haven’t written a poem since I courted my wife!

You have the right attitude. You are looking for solutions. Sounds like your job situation isn't helping things. Perhaps you should write us a poem.

Paul,

So sorry to hear of your woes.

They are surely not atypical of many of us as we do more than most ordinary people, not consumed by glimpses of money or success but rather by the ability to learn and to earn more as we help others along the way.

I personally reflect on the blessings most of us have when compared with countless millions who are equally deserving but who, due to socio or political circumstances are beholden to poverty and despair. I also think of how prior generations have not only endured, but innovated and even prospered, often in exile, without all the technology we have today. No paved roads, no clean water, not even trash removal, etc.

Take heart in our Creatoe, the One who never leaves the one behind

Blessings!

Hi Paul, all will be well. All you need to do is just ask. If we can help with anything, we will!

Here is to a better forthcoming week.
Graham

Thanks, Graham. Your kindness lights up the sky!

Anytime Paul 😁

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