The voices in my head have a lot to say
The voices in my head have a lot to say...
The problem is, I can't hear them over the other noises that are constant.
"What noises?" you may ask.
Well, that's a tough one because there are many.
There is the obligatory voice of my 9 to 5 job that is constantly throwing demanding voices into my ear.
There is the voice of family. This is a hard voice. I don't want to ignore this voice, but sometimes it is so demanding that it is impossible to get much done.
I have the voices of my grandchildren wanting my attention. While I love it, it is still a difficult voice because I can't ignore it, but I can't get work done with it in my ear all the time, either.
It is undoubtedly the hardest voice to deal with. Those of you with families or children or grandchildren definitely know what I am talking about. You don't want to ignore their voices, but at the same time, the voices within my head (thoughts, inspiration, ideas) have to be neglected to make room for all the noise outside of it.
I try to explain to my granddaughter that she has to "pretend" I am at work even though I am home. But 7-year-olds don't always understand that concept. If she sees me, I must therefore be available for her beck and call!
It's similar with a spouse who wants attention. They don't always understand that when inspiration strikes, you have to do something.
There are a lot of other more minor voices that can be intense when they are neglected, too.
For example:
- Household chores
- Bill paying
- Meal planning
- Hobbies
It can become intense when there are so many voices vying for center stage of my prefrontal cortex!
In those few moments of peace and quiet, I may start a blog or a training, but most times those get interrupted, too.
Sometimes I just put my headphones on and don't even have anything playing through them because if the people around me assume I am listening to something they don't bother me.
But sometimes, they will stand there in front of me talking a mile a minute. With music going, all I see are their mouths moving. Then I feel a bit of annoyance because I know they will keep doing it until I acknowledge them.
Still, I somehow manage and you can, too. We can take those precious moments in the morning before others awake. Or those hours in the evening after the others have gone to bed.
Those voices of mine need an outlet! Yours do, too! Let's give them what they need—a release.
With 2020 Vision,
Karin 😎
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I can totally relate.
I'm a mom with two kids at home, a husband, and a dog. There are constant demands: chores, school assignments (when there's school), field trip permission slips, camp enrollment, recreation activities, and the list can go on.
To make matters more complicated, now we have distance learning because of COVID-19 which adds more complexity because parents have to be more involved because teachers aren't on-site to answer questions like parents are.
It helps to make routines that your family gets used to. For me, I've gotten stricter and stricter about my schedule. We have a morning routine, a midday routine, and a bedtime routine. Similar to a school environment, when you have routines, your family will get used to "breakfast time", "mom's work time" (which means they do independent activities), "chore time", and so on.
It takes quite a bit of communication and reinforcement, but it gets much easier as you keep consistently reinforcing those boundaries.
I've tried to teach my kids things they can do independently. For example, my 3-year-old will make microwave snacks for herself in between meals--this helps a ton to give me my allotted "mommy work time".
It gets better with practice.
Thanks for sharing these ideas. That is one thing that has been lacking in this household since the pandemic...a routine! For a while during school, we did, but since school's been out... it has been a free-for-all around here with the kid bored and talking non-stop! LOL
It'll get better once school starts again, but I would like to start implementing these changes now! Seriously, thank you for the ideas!
With 2020 Vision,
Karin 😎
You’re welcome! It’s easy to drop the routines when transitions happen but they help so much!
Good morning Karin--6:15 here in St. Louis. Some might think that someone who lives alone wouldn't have a lot of voices demanding attention. Not so, my friend. They are here clamoring to be heard. Morning is my best time to sort them all out and decide which ones to follow and which ones to put away for another time.
I sometimes write down ideas to keep for another day--then I lose where I wrote them.
It's a never ending cycle; the mind never shuts down--We do what we can and let the rest slide.
I have decided if it's important enough I'll get it done- if it's just a passing whim, I'll let it go.
Barb, I feel such a kindred spirit with you. The voices/responsibilities are always there, but we have to sort them out.
I have hundreds, nay, thousands of notes on scraps of paper. When we clean house, we can't just throw things away because I might have a note or idea written on the back of that old calendar page or envelop. So I have to check them all. I have started putting a lot of notes on my phone which helps a lot, but I still have a lot of times when it is just easier to jot a quick note on a piece of paper. Am I right? LOL
My brain goes all the time, too. Thankfully when I sleep, I can usually "dream out" some solutions!
I hope all is going well for you. Is the Adsense problem resolved?
Take care, friend!
With 2020 Vision,
Karin 😎
A note on keeping notes: I buy those 3-holebinders that everybody uses in school for my notes .I have one for household bills and notes, one for the website, and one for Etsy. It saves a lot of random notes and scraps of paper--although there are still those that get jotted down with intent to transfer.
Haven't heard back from google yet on AdSense. they'll probably turn me down- everyone else has- even amazon .Although amazon pays so little it's probably not a loss.
Hey Karin,
Definitely in the same boat as you, headphones and all...well, except grandkids so far. But, yes, I've had the same problem for years since my "office" is in the living room off to the side. Not to mention the silent voices...bills, my 9-5 job, daily chores, etc. Oh, and can't forget the dogs and cat too. They add their voice too, lol.
Headphones do work to a point especially since I seem to focus better listening to music although a lot of times I don't realize it once the music stops, lol. But, I know what you mean...even with them on I often get interrupted by either my son or hubby talking to me, which is occasionally irritating to say the least. And, the dogs just don't care either way..I'll feel them giving me the stare, lol.
I've found I usually get the most done when everyone else is sleeping...if you can either find a time in the morning or night to even have an hour or two of peace and quiet to get the most important things done, or at least some steps towards getting those done.
Another thing which sometimes works with my son is telling him if I can finish what I'm working on, I'll be able to play games, go for a walk, swimming, etc.. at a certain time, as that's often what he's asking...but then I have to make sure I hold up my end of the bargain. Might be something to try with your granddaughter or have her do an activity that she enjoys nearby like coloring or a puzzle, etc. Those usually worked for a bit with both of mine, although it's never perfect.
Hope you'll find something to help those voices in your head! Good luck and much success to you!
Best wishes :) ~Sherry
Thank you, Sherry.
Yes, that seems to be the magic of music, it does help with focus!
I work on getting stuff done when the family is sleeping, but sometimes I am too tired by the time everyone goes to sleep! Today was especially difficult. My granddaughter seemed to need my attention for something every couple of minutes.
I finally took your suggestion and told her if I finished the thing I was working on, I would go on a bike ride with her. She let me get done and only pestered me about 1/2 a dozen times to see if I was done yet. We were able to take a nice long bike ride and she was very happy about it!
With 2020 Vision,
Karin 😎
I know the feeling all too well...some nights they just can't get to bed soon enough and I end up getting only some of my tasks done and falling asleep at the computer, lol.
Awww, that is awesome to hear, I was hoping it would help some. Plus a bike ride is a good way to get outside for awhile and hopefully it'll help tire them out!
Best wishes :) ~Sherry
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Hi Karin2020, as humans and as mothers I think we all can say sometime we goes through those voices that we hear in our ears from the babies cry to the adults you just have so many hats to feel so many responsibilities but evidently you are doing great.
Keep up the good work and best wishes to you as you continue your journey
Best regards
Dorothy
We sure do hear many voices all the time. Those hats need a filter! LOL
Thanks for commenting, Dorothy!
With 2020 Vision,
Karin 😎