Mental Health and You. Be The Solution To The Problem (Help).
Hello WA family,
This is such a important subject. If I have offended anyone I apologized. I didn't answer some of the comments because I didn't have the answer and I didn't know what to say.
There are some families that talk about mental health but they are far and few between. Abuse is another touchy subject with me because of what I had lived with my entire life. The abuse stopped when my biological parents died. And if though it was well over thirty years ago it still feels like it was yesterday. The comments that were made was imbedded into my brain. When I have a really bad day that comes up. It all comes flowing back to when I was 3 years old.
I am being very transparent with you all because we are a family and I feel that you all need to know who I really am. It has gotten somewhat easier to talk about because I am trying to help others that I have experience that I understand how they feel.
I have experienced through many doctors and therapist they always say (I understand) they don't know how you feel or what you have going through because they are not in your shoes.
The reason why I have PTSD is because I was raped by a co-worker who was also a roommate. It happen twice and I didn't report it because at that time the police was sending male detectives to take the report. Then because I didn't report it he raped another woman. Any way this is what a co-worker said about me that (I deserved to be raped). One of my bosses laughed when I told her and she was reprimanded by her boss. Both of them made me feel more ashamed, dirty, guilty for what happen.
I am speaking about this because this was the caused of the PTSD. The military isn't the only ones that have it. The police, firefighters, doctors, nurses. anybody that sees trauma will have PTSD. I am talking about this to show that again NOT to be ashamed, or guilty about any of this. I felt those feeling for a long time, until I went into therapy for it and was encourage to talk about it.
Yes it opened the wound but it needed to be opened and cleaned out so it could heal. That is the main reason why I started writing in the first place. To a book about this and how to deal with it. I did write a book two as a matter of fact they are both children's books and I am in the middle of the third book.
Yes it is scary especially when it happens to a child. That is when I really get mad because the child will never be the same again the innocences is gone forever. That is how I gone involved with forensic psychology. It is dealing with dead people yes but dead people tells the story loud and clear all we have to do is listen to what they are saying.
I was trying to find out what makes serial killers, serial rapist do what they do by getting into there heads and thinking like them. It wasn't that hard but it wasn't pleasant why they did what they did. It all center around mental health. They needed help and no one was listening. Their family members, friends, co-workers all turned a deaf ear to the cries of needed help.
This what I am talking about not everyone will turn into killer but they may try to commit suicide instead either way mentally ill people are crying for help in so many ways. We just have to stop turning a deaf ear to it and start doing more listening to them.
That is why people that are in pain just want to stop hurting so much, Some turn to alcohol, drugs, sex sometime all three together. Some just go to suicide the 1st time. Especially our kids we need to listen to them and watch their behavior. Has it changed are they with different friends, are their grades slipping, are they skipping school, or are they experimenting heavily.
There are many reasons why people to what they do. When someone doesn't care to know what is going on and listening and watching for the changes in their love one. By the time the family member realizes what is going on it is too late.
I can't blame the police they haven't been properly trained to deal with mental health issues. If you want change then start pleading with the major or your councilman or councilwoman and get more psychristric, psychologist or someone that can handle mental health issues. This is to prevent suicides or shootings. To prevent more bloodshed.
I am one of many who is a survivor and no longer a victim. You have to stop being a victim and take that power back and be a survivor. I understand that the damage is done and you can't change what happen, but find a good psychiatrist, psychologist or even both. The psychiatrist can prescribe medication and the psychologist will sit and listen to you so you can get a handle on your feelings.
Note: Please if someone you know a friend or family member is crying for help. Please help them get them to a professional, Yes it is going to be a battle but once they get the help they will thank you in their own time.
Suicide Prevention Number: 988 please call this number and get help.
Thank you for taking the time to read my post.
Recent Comments
31
Thank you for the post. I do feel bad (sorry) for what happened to you. (What does that even mean - I don't really know?). I do like the fact that you have shared your experience, by sharing, we can hopefully make things better for ourselves and others.
I know I do not like it when I realize that other people are hurting. Words are never sufficient to convey feelings at times.
I am glad you are a survivor; I know it takes incredible strength to just get by these days, let alone overcome and survive adversity. It is easy to generalize, and I do not mean to do so. What you describe is foreign to me. I do not understand the ability of some to pull down, consume and attempt to destroy others. I know that in theory, it makes them feel better about themselves, and/ they just need to do it. But it makes no sense to me.
I know I am incredibly lucky that I have not seen such adversity in my life, and I am grateful for the life that I have.
All the best.
Alex
Thank you Alex for the kind and gentle words that you have used. I appreciate that so very much.
Yes I have gone through a lot of adversity but I am stronger for it I am a better person because of it and I thank God for getting me through that dark time in my life.
I am also glad that I can help others in there time of need. Or whatever it may be I am here ready and willing to help others to be survivors like myself.
Mary
I am very sorry to hear what happened to you, Mary.
There are a lot of psychologists and other mental health experts who were also victims of abuse. They can help a lot of other people and, at the same time, heal themselves. Choosing this profession is self-healing for themselves.
It is marvelous that you also help others. That means you are on the right path to self-healing.
Do you know Dr. Shefali's book titled Radical Awakening?
Thank you so much for your kind words. Yes there are many mental health professional that have the experience but they are far and few between.
That is why I chose this profession among other reasons. When I would go the VA hospital the veterans would talk with me when they wouldn't talk to their doctors.
These doctors say they understand but they don't because they haven't experience what we have.
And many victims' are so traumatize with fear, and that will lead to anxiety, and even phobias.
No I am not familiar with that book. When you get the chance watch Copy Cat and Sybil these is what I call psychological movies.
They are both very good movies that show you what happens to someone who development phobias and what happens when a person is multi personalities.
I have watch both movies and did reports on both of them for my psyche class. It really brought reality to the surface.
Mary
Thank you very much for the film recommendations; I will see them when I have more free time.
Do you study psychology?
Yes, I am in school working on my bachelor degree. But I had to take this year off due to unseen foreseen incidents.
I hope that this helps you out. The two films that I mention they deal with how psychology plays a roll in a crime.
Mary
Congratulations! I hope you continue your studies as the problems are solved.
Yes, psychology plays a significant role in crime and every part of life.
Good mental health is needed for a happy and healthy relationship, happy family life, and your profession. We can make good decisions if we are mentally well.
Thank you yes I can't wait to get back into school so I can get that bachelor degree.
Yes psychology is very important because when you are doing this kind of work you have to be able to get into the killer's head and think how this person thinks and then you would be able to catch them.
Many cases have been solved by working with a psychologist.
It is very interesting work because each case is different and it never the same dull experience.
Yes that is all well and good but that is when everything is perfect but that doesn't exist. You do have mental health issues. You can be better with therapy, and in most cases medication.
Mary
Dealing with killers is the most challenging area of psychology, I guess. You are courageous and strong!
Perfectionism doesn't exist. We need to develop all the time. There is always something inside us or in our life that could be developed.
Medication can be just temporary solutions, so-called "crutches," but they just treat the symptoms. For the whole healing, psychotherapy is needed.
Yes I can honestly say profiling a killer is challenging because as a forensic psychologist.
We have to describe what the killer was doing what he was thinking his mind set. We can even come up with a moviate why he killed.
We have to draw from what we feel. It can be exhausting though because it take a lot of energy to do this.
Being perfect does exist. There was one perfect man that came into this world as a baby. We just strive to be perfect.
As far as medication goes it might be a temporary solution for some but not for a person with a mental illness.
A person with a mental illness depends on their medication to stop the terrors that come with some of the illnesses.
Medication is the only thing that helps us to function as a normal person. psychotherapy doesn't often work. I know from experience.
Each person has their own thoughts about mental illness that is why a stress to educate yourselves.
So you know what you are dealing with and how to cope with the illness of a family member.
Because it all falls on the families because they become the caregivers of the ill family member.
I have put my husband a lot with my illness. It isn't fun to have to deal with the guilt of being sick everyday for the rest of your life.
Mary
Yes, Mary! This is prevalent, especially in this day and age. It is very sad, of course, but also cling to your Faith too, my friend! When it gets too overwhelming, then say a little prayer, then let go and LET GOD!
Take care, my dear friend!
Jeff🙏
Thank you Jeff I appreciate your kind words and yes if anything I have my faith and my husband.
I thank God for both because without either one of them I don't know where I would be or what I would doing.
Blessing In Christ
Mary
Absolutely most definitely I will always follow the Lord. My faith has always been a part my life even when I can't feel God's presents.
I have been reminded so many times of the poem Footprints (which by the way is my favorite poem). I just keep on moving forward. That is all I can do.
Mary
That is my favorite poem too, and even though I know what is coming, I always cry at the end which is why I would not be an effective preacher, Mary!
Jeff😥
It was the first poem that I came across when I first became saved.
It has a place in my heart when I am down I look at the poem and it makes me feel better.
Mary
That is awesome. For some reason Footprints has a calming effect just knowing that Jesus carries us when things are bad.
Mary
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Great post, I can relate to what you have said in this post. I too was abused all through my childhood and raped at 15. I did seek help and managed to come to terms with it. I am sorry for what happened to you, as you know it is a horrible place to be especially when no one will listen to you. You tend to bottle it up inside going over what happened to you over and over again, telling yourself "If I had not have been in that situation at that time it wouldn`t have happened" or "will my father hate me if I say something" YES, a hell of a lot of emotions go through your mind, and YES you do think about it from time to time but, you learn to live with it. You have a great day, take care.
Hi Brian, That is the problem we shouldn't have to live with it. But because that power was taken away from us.
Then years later we regain that power and then we still have to live with the shame and guilt of the assault because like you said no will listen to us.
Then we live in fear the rest of our lives because of the nightmares. And we have to go through the therapy sometimes the attacker is caught and sometimes the attacker isn't caught.
I wish there was some way we could get rid of this problem and we can't and no one knows how we feel, or think, or what we live with.
Mary
Absolutely, we just learn to cope with it and move on best we can.🙏
You are right on that. It just breaks my heart that these criminals gets away with it and the victims pay the heaviest of prices of all.
We are the ones living in fear, looking over our shoulders, having the nightmares, living with the guilt and shame thinking we did somehow deserve it,
Yet the criminals live a happy life until if ever get caught. They don't live with what we do. It is so unfair that we suffer and they don't.
Mary