A Pivotal Event That Defined "Pay it Forward" for Me

byArmlemt

941 followers

6 years ago

I was just reading paulgoodwin's post about paying it forward and it reminded me of something that happened in my life that defined "pay it forward" for me.

This was many years ago now. My husband and I were divorcing (we are remarried now). I had the children and I was hosting them for Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I had very little money, as did my housemate and good friend, Dane, who was also going through a divorce. We really wanted a Christmas tree for the kids, though. We wanted to give them a nice Christmas.

Finally, Christmas Eve came. We pulled together all our money and scraped up all the change in our cars to try to buy a tree. It was a cold, dreary day with a horrible wind carrying a mix of rain and sleet.

We pulled in to a Christmas tree stand near our house that promised half price on Christmas Eve. We found a tree and then found the man who ran the stand.

We talked for a while and told him how we were trying to make a nice Christmas for my two young children. We showed him the tree we had picked out. It was a Charlie Brown sort of tree - small and tattered looking.

The gentleman said that tree would never do. We told him that it was all could afford. He looked at us and said, "let me see what I can do."

He came back with the nicest premium tree he had. He sold it to us for most, but not all of the money we had pooled together. We were stunned. Now the sleet was coming down in earnest and the man at the Christmas tree stand had no shelter. He stood at the fire in the barrel he had set up, like a hobo, and tried to stay as warm as he could.

Dane asked me to count up what we had left. I did. We had exactly enough to buy a cup of coffee at the 7-11. (An amount we both knew well as we often bought coffees there.)

Dane said, "We have to do something nice for the man. We drove to the 7-11 and bought the cup of coffee. We brought plenty of cream and sugar along for the man in case he needed it.

By the time we drove the two blocks back to the Christmas tree lot, the man was gone. He had packed it in and abandoned his trees. Strangely, the fire was not only out, it was cold.

This left us with the cup of coffee. I asked Dane if he wanted it. He said, "No. We are going to pay this man's kindness forward to someone." By who?

We drove around town for a few minutes. I spotted a small Asian man standing next to the Salvation Army bucket in front of the grocery store, ringing the bell as he tried to keep himself warm. I told Dane to pull over. I pointed to the man and Dane took the coffee to him.

You would have thought that we had placed a million dollars in his bucket! His smile alone warmed me from the bitter cold. The look on his face was priceless!

The man explained how he had really been wanting a hot cup of coffee to warm him, but like us, he had no money. He was a recovering alcoholic who lived at the Salvation Army Like Dane and me, he was starting his life over. He asked what he could do for us and Dane told him to pay the kindness forward.

As we drove away, the sleet stopped falling.

This made Christmas for both Dane and me. Little did we know it was to be Dane's last Christmas. In his honor, wherever I am, I take a cup of coffee to a stranger working out in the elements on Christmas Eve. There have been years where I was too ill to get out and those years, Christmas seemed incomplete somehow.

Throughout my life there have been times when someone helped me through a tough spot in life without asking anything in return. I have strived to pay their kindness forward and I've tried to teach my children to do the same.

The other night, my oldest daughter (one of the young children Dane and I were trying to make a nice Christmas for) suggested that we forgo Christmas gifts this year and give what we would have spent to Charity or to a family in need.

We considered it and decided to make one last big Christmas for my youngest, also named Dane, who has special needs and still believes in Santa. We are keeping the idea in mind for next year. We will adopt a family with small children for Thanksgiving and Christmas, providing their meals, their tree with decorations and their gifts from "Santa."

Here at Wealthy Affiliate, there is a "pay it forward" system in place. We pay it forward by helping one another and cheering each other on. That is one thing I love about being here!

How do you pay it forward in your business and in your life? I'd really like to hear your stories.

Anita