Tough times

23
2.9K followers

Hi-ya!

It's been awhile since I've checked in here, and consequently losing ground with getting under the "100" level in the community. Not that the score means that I am more or less successful than anyone else -- it is just a personal score I wanted to reach.

As some of you may know, I work full time as a legal assistant, and my attorney is retiring at the end of the month. The lawyer who was going to take over the practice, and thus guarantee me a job, changed the parameters at the 11th hour, and the deal fell through. So my back is against the wall, as I scramble to find another position -- and quickly.

The stress is overwhelming, and I have lost ground here at WA, and also with posting and maintaining my WA websites. I am struggling financially, and my son, who is home from college for the summer, is stressed and worried for me.

I'm not writing for "sympathy" although I won't turn it away -- I am writing to find out how NOT to turn this into my fault, and would love some ideas on how NOT to blame myself for all of this. I am quickly going down regrets road, and that is not a healthy thing to do. We all have regrets in life, but I am thinking that it is best to live in the solution, and not go back.

Anyway, thanks, in advance, for your thoughts -- and for your friendship!

/a.


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Recent Comments

53

This is not your fault. It is important for you to see this. I can't remember how many times things failed to work out for me professionally and personally. Each time, it was difficult emotionally and financially, but each time something good came of the issues. Hang in there and keep the faith. I look forward to seeing a post from you soon telling us how great you are doing.

You mean I'm not the only one...?! It is hard to keep perspective sometimes. Thank you -- I went on a great interview today, so fingers crossed...!

Hello, Amy,
I have been in your shoes many times over my career as I was always in sales. It can be a numbing feeling of panic at the thought of a regular paycheck suddenly not coming in. With your ability to work hard and your willingness to reach out, what about writing a daily blog of everything you experience, sharing your thoughts and what you do do every day to replace the income (if you lose it). Make sure you use social media, especially Linked In so that the social media network in Linked In follows your journey. When you solve the steady check problem, you might want to keep on with the blog. A lot of those members face the same challenges.
You might add as many PPC ads on your blog that help get jobs for people. This will take some research as I don't know anything about the area you work in.
The hardest part will be baring your soul but skillfully and thoughtfully done, I think a lot of people would read it. Search for a really good domain name with a lot of queries made so maybe you can gather a lot of organic traffic.
The search query for "how to find a job" shows 796,000,000 searches in Google so there is huge interest. The trick would be finding a suitable domain name that has room to grow.
I wrote a blog about creating a target rich keyword domain. If you like, let me know and I'll send it to you privately as I don't think we're supposed to put URLs in our messages.
Please keep in touch. You are very wise to use the community for help. Cordially, David

Hi David,
Thanks for reaching out and for your great ideas! I think you could put a link here, but please private message me, as I would love to read it. A blog, hmm...? Interesting idea -- !!
Thank you,
/a.

Hi Amy
Sorry to hear you were let down at the 11th hour. And no, this is NOT your fault! I know that something like this happenning is a shock but I promise, things will look brighter when it wears off. My personal belief is that these things always happen for a reason. I am willing to bet that if you keep your eyes open, something unexpected and better will pop up! It has happened to me too many times to be a coincidence!
I can see by your face that you are a good person and good things always happen to good people!
Let me know when it does!

Thank you, Althea - I hope you are right...! I will keep you posted!

Good morning to you Amy. I myself would like to suggest that it's darkest before the dawn. Do your best in keeping your thoughts positive and never give up on the Lord that will provide for you in HIs time.
I understand the confusion and desperation that you must be feeling now and I sympathize with you. I would like to be able to say that all will be fine but it is not up to me. We all take care of one another here at WA and I am sure an opportunity will come available to you very soon. Keep the faith and never give up.
Ken

Thank you, Ken -- means so much to me...!

Thanks again for all the great suggestions and affirmations. It means so much to me to have such a supportive community here. What a great feeling to know that we are all out for each other's best interests.
I think that for me, the stress comes from not only the impending unemployment situation, but also the fear of the unknown -- fear of working at a job which has little to no meaning for me. I am so done with that, which is another reason why I am here.
How do you get past that?
Anyway, I didn't mean for this forum to become group therapy!
Thank you so much !!!

Well, I am in a slightly similar situation. I lost my job some time back and had truly hoped and half-expected that I would be successful at WA by this point, so that I wouldn't have to go back to a regular job.

But here I am, job hunting.

On one hand, it is like you said-- I don't want to do that kind of work anymore and it just really doesn't appeal to me when I consider how much better things could be if my online stuff took off. On the other hand, I am extremely grateful (or more correctly, I WILL be) for the opportunity to work at all, and to earn money to help support my family. I may not like the type of work, or want to do it anymore, but I am excited at the prospect of what doing it can provide for me.

That's how I'm looking at it.

Yes that is a very healthy way to look at it. You, me, and millions of other people are in jobs that are less than fulfilling, -- but unless we move to the mountains and live in a cabin, we have to keep working. Until, of course, we make it here on WA...! Thanks.

Amy, I can feel with you. Sometimes we are forced to look for a different direction. When one door is closing another one is open.
I know to say think positively is hard in a situation, but try to repeat in your head that all will work out for you.
Life will bring a rainbow, don't worry everything will work out.
cheers Sylvia

Thank you, Sylvia -- that means so much to me!

Of course none of this is your fault Amy. Now that we have that out of the way . The key to thriving is education. on solutions. Tear into the training with a passion. Elevate your learning. You can take Udemy courses. Then apply your knowledge with dedicated searching. It's out there. Go out and bring it in!!

Great ideas -- I love the Udemy idea as well, but it won't pay the (enormous) bills I am faced with. I wish this website had a "go-fund-me" section for those of us needing emergency assistance! What a way to pay it forward, no?

This is not your fault! You will get back up on your feet! I am sure you have an outstanding resume with a lot more credibility than most, so dust off your regret and get back into the game. I want to hear you say, I am a woman, hear me roar! You got this Amy, you got this!

You're making me cry -- thank you for that. Hard to remember, sometimes!!!

I don't really see any way in which this could be your fault. Don't give the negative thoughts any traction or they will grow and multiply. You don't want to be in a negative frame of mind while looking for a job.

I agree with Patsy below; just keep reminding yourself that you will get through this, that things are ok, and that everything happens for a reason. If that deal fell through, it's only because something better is coming.

You can and will find employment somewhere else. Don't doubt yourself.

Thanks so much for the kind words. Very much appreciated!

Sorry to hear this happened to you.
There is NO way this is your fault, you got blindsided in the worst way, and there is NO reason to blame yourself?
What is it that you are regretting you didn't do anything wrong.

At least you acknowledge that it's not a healthy thing to do and that it's best to live in the solution. Make this sentence part of your affirmation.

Make a list of positive affirmations and say them daily or several times a day like, I will get through this, I will be fine, I have support through WA, I'm not alone, my son is home etc...

It's sad that your son is stressed and worried, you need to assure him that he need not be.

It's hard to think positive but thinking negative and stressing is drawing negative energy to yourself and will then attract negative results.

It will also make you sick fast. You can't be that way while searching for work.

I hope you find a job quickly, keep us posted and don't stress over your website!

Thanks, Patsy -- I love the idea of carrying around affirmations. I used to do that and now I need to do it again. You are right that the negativity will make me sick, and I am so filled with anxiety right now, which is not healthy. I need to regroup and find my power somehow, which I know is in there!!! Thank you.

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